Babies Born November 2006 #38

gigi - intimo party is underwear/outwear - bras and knickers, and clothes made from this cool material. in the end, two people came - but we had a lovely time, and the kids all played. good news about the op for your DP.

DH has hurt his shoulder at work, and it looks like he may need an operation. its all cover by work cover, but he is stressed about not being able to do what he usually does, and can't even pick aston up... so I'm doing all the lifting - which is so great for alleviating my pain - not! between the two of us we are a couple of cripples at the moment.

Sorry to hear about ur DH Vicky, when will he find out if he needs an operation?

im just going to copy and paste wat i wrote in my belly buddies thread...
i just got back from appt and im more confused than ever :( this doctor i seen today highly recommends i have a c/s but told me if i really want a vag delivery then its totally up to me. she said if i choose to have a vag delivery then there is a chance of shoulder dystocia again and could turn out worse than wat happen to DD. then she goes on to say but if u have a c/s cos im overweight there is a higher risk of me getting clots and infections etc...i have no idea wat to do?! just wish i could see into the future and see if i gave birth vaginally everything would turn out ok and bub would be safe. i really dont want a c/s...i have a big decision to make:(

sorry about the me post but i cant think straight i just dont know wat to do if i have a vag delivery then i could be putting my baby at risk of lifetime injury or worst case death and if i have a c/s im at risk..i just want my baby to be safe so now im thinking i will just have c/s but then im petrified of that..arghhhhh!

Wow Blanche, I'm sorry there's no black and white decision for you...maybe u need to sit and write it all down. It's easier to treat clots and infection tho...and i'm pretty sure that that is a pretty standard warning they give to anyone undergoing an anaesthetic...
If it were me..i think i'd go to c/s..i dont know if i would risk the dystocia when the risks from the c/s are slight and treatable..
i dont know..i only just thought about it in the 3 minutes since reading your post and replying...

:comfort: blanche

based on what information is the doctor recommending you have a c-section hun? hypothetical - maybes? or fact? what is it in particular that you are afraid of with the c-section? I only ask because I have had three, and as you know the last one was the best.

the only thing I can say to you is research research research! see if you can find any statistical data to support the chances of having two babies with shoulder dystocia. did it happen with emelia because your pelvis is too small? do you know what caused it to happen?

I know I have asked you a lot of questions - whatever decision you make, make it an informed one. dont let medical practitioners "scare" you into doing something that your heart doesnt want to do. knowledge is power darlin.

because I can't help myself I had to go researching for myself, and did find an informative website.i'll msn you the link. xxx

Hope Rich recovers ok Vicky.

Blanche im sorry you have a tough decision to make. I agree with Vicky, research for stats on 2 babies having the same shoulder issue. For me id try for a vag birth, but thats me. The reason i say vag is cos i know how hard it was when Jasmine was born trying to handle Chelsea at the same time and a c/s would have put me *out of action* cps she is so active even at 11 months old....could only imagine if i was to have to choose now. No decision is wrong....and its not easy making a choice. Goodluck. What does Leigh think is the best plan?

Blanche its so hard & confusing. Maybe see if a library around you has some books like :"A Thinking Women's Guide to Better Birth" by Henci Goer. It weighs up pro's and con's of most things.

I found so many different stories so confusing. The OB's were totally for me having a VBAC until I hit 38 weeks. I am sooooo super passionate about birth choices after my first birth with Matilda, which was 20hours of labour resulting in c/s. I guess it was so traumatic for me, I wasn't going to go near having another one.

Having said that, I would research the shoulder dystocia first and see what the stats are. Make your own decision mate, it is your choice ;)

Lots of good points Blanche, I guess if you research as much as you can and are comfortable with your decision then that's all you can do. After all, isnt being a parent all about 'doing the best you can with what you know at the time'? Thats what I live by, anyways
what the hell am i still doing up?!?!

aww blanche its a tough one, check this out, not sure if its much help!
https://www.bellybelly.com.au/forums...es-nudity.html
perhaps chat to the girls in labour area.

vicky hope DH arm is ok!

URGH... I think I caught gastro cyberly!!!! LOL no one I know has it, but today... vomitting my guts out. I have to work tonight... man this sucks.

oh no Christy, hope it wasnt me that passed it through cyber space!! hope ur feeling better by tonight..can u call in sick?

i think i have come to a decision to go ahead and have a c/s (still would rather not have one) but i thought about it ALOT and done alot of research(thanks Vicky for the links)! and i just dont think i could live with myself if anything happened to my boy if i was to have a vag delivery. its just the unknown and it sucks :( but in the end as long as i have a healthy and happy baby i will be happy

its such a hard decision blanche but i ghave to admit if it were me id probably go the c/s, i know how much u want a vag del. and id feel exactly the same

Im glad you have made a decision Blanche...i now it must not have been an easy one.

Good on u Blanche, I think thats the right decision too and as long as you are happy with it then thats all that matters ;) mark that as one more thing off your list done.
is it too early to start getting my hospital bags ready? i swear this kid is burrowing its way between my legs. Sorry if TMI but everytime i go to the toilet i am expecting to hear a splash and cry lol no seriously...

LOL Tara!! i still havent fully packed my bags im so unorganised!! i think if u want to pack them do it, but then it might make it drag on everytime u look at the bag iykwim?..

i must get my act together and finish packing mine!

lol tara!! i hope not!!!

blanche so when will the c/s be sone then?

Jols not sure on the date as yet, have an appt on tuesday and thats when i will tell them my decision, the told me that if i chose a c/s they would do it at 39wks...so hopefully i will know tuesday when we will meet our little boy :)

Tara Bubby has to cook a tad longer..so dont go having her/him in the loo just yet!!!

All the best Blanche for Tuesday...so close now til Mr Jack is here!!

oh wow, i was coming to this thread to ask you Blanche, if you've come any closer to a decision - and obviously you have - i bet you've agonised over this - but it must be a relief to have A decision.

taralee, stranger things have happened! My midwife told me she had "caught" babies in the toilet as some of "her women" had felt most comfortable pushing near/on the loo.

bilby's first CC day on a Thursday today, she was only there a few hours when i had to take her out (so dh could use my car to take stepchild to airport). So my one and only day that is meant to be free, was spent packing stepchild's baggage and trying to get some concepts thru to her - she thinks it's ok to walk around with just jeans on - so we had the modesty talk. She's starting to change with puberty, and she's had more stepfathers than i can count, just so hard to know if anything i say to her gets thru. She went swimming at a public pool with dh the other day, first time she's had to shower and get changed by herself (in a public changeroom), and she came out crying and in a absolute panic, hair everywhere. Normally i am there to act as her carer and make everythign go smoothly. just can't do it anymore, now bilby is here. i am sick of being taken for granted.

kim, how are your two cheeky monkeys going? What have you got planned for Mummy Time on Saturday? (go on, inspire me!!).

Vicky - how is your dh?

Christy - hope your gastro doesn't spread to the rest of your family, and that it is a short lived one - gastro is so damm rotten - could not imagine leaving the house with it! hope your work is not far from your home!!!

My monkeys are well......the only day we needed them to sleep in (cos of the flight) and they wake at 630am!!!!

No mummy time this week Gigi....going to be at my IL's so family day...all the relos are coming over for lunch etc. So SD is gone now? Time for you to chill :)

Time stars next Saturday maybe!!!!

Christy i hope you get better soon...gastro is horrid!

I didn't get to work after all :( too much vomit. Luckily I'm feeling better today.

Glad to hear it Christy :)
Gigi - that seems a little weird to me..that she just has jeans on...maybe it's just because i'm a prude..dh tells me so lol
ahem..also i started a little bit of nesting today..couldnt scrub those bathrooms enough..what the hell is going on! lol

Taralee - stop nesting! its too soon... that bambino has to cook some more.

Christy - glad your feeling better today. Isnt it a beautiful day in Qld today? I'm hoping to get my car back at the end of next week, once I get it back I want to take it for a good run, so we will have to organise a meet up at North Lakes.

Kim - I was looking at photos of Chelsea and Jasmine last night. I can't beleive how quickly Jas has grown. They are lovely photos hun. Hope you have a nice time away.

Gigi - i hope that next week you can get to have some you time! I made the mistake this monday of letting someone come up to my place and finish some paintings that they had started, and seeing as how she could talk the hind leg of a dog, I hardly got anything done. I was feeling very p!ssed off about that afternoon, and realise that from now on I have to make monday MY day, and everyone else can go to buggery. I need the day to feed my soul. About your Step daughter - I know she has some disablilities physically, does she have any intellectual disabilities? I am trying to remember how hold she is. Laura turned 12 at the beginning of this year. And Rich is not coping very well with the changes going on with her. Neither am I, just quietly, but after some counselling, I realised what was going on was about me, not her... she is at an age when some pretty yuk stuff was happening to me. Anyway, its a difficult age regardless.
Rich went to the specialist on Wednesday, and has to have an MRI. The specialist is pretty sure that it is a bicep anchor injury, the tendon from his bicep that should be attached to his shoulder, is either torn, or completely detached. which means an operation.... sigh. He is getting frustrated because he doesnt like being incapacitated, and not being able to do anything. And I am a whole lot more pain because of it, because I'm doing more as well... vicious circle really.

Blanche - I'm glad I was able to help in some small way. Like I said, message me with any questions you might have about c/s ok.

HI Jols, Ann, Nelly... Hope everyone is enjoying their long weekend.

I have loaded some new photos onto facebook, and sent you all an invite to look at a video of aston using tupperware in a very inventive way - good for a giggle. :)

Vicky - same thing happened each of the two time that dh's back "went" on him. All the lifting of bilby at night and weekends, all of the housework he usually did, all of it had to be done by me, as well as the help he needed - so then MY back really suffered. It can be a domino effect. I hope the MRI scan gives your dh's medicos useful info to help him.

My SD's disability is a mixture of physical and intellectual - but she's in the right school year for her age - although i'm not so sure how kind that is to her. It really hit me these holidays, how "young" and immature she is compared to other kids her age, how easy it would be for her to be bullied, let astray, all sorts of things. She is terribly gullible and unaware of so many things. I have tremendous sympathy for her, but while i used to act as her full time carer pre bilby (i'm talking years here), i can no longer keep that up. Dh is not holding up his side of the bargain (promising he will take care of SD's care while she's here). Each time the holidays come around, my head is full of divorce/separation ideas - it's THAT bad. Our cramped living conditions do not help either.

bilby had her first ride in an ambulance today. I got strapped onto the stretcher and she lay on me - had no idea that's how babies are transported. It's to calm the baby. This morning, i was changing bilby on the changetable, and she stood up while i was reaching for something, and fell off - instead of just hitting the floor - which is carpet, so that sort of fall wouldn't have been so bad (in comparision), becuase she fell in a tiny triangle of
- edge of solid wooden changetable with wooden shelf at bottom of it
- tall bookcase with three sharp edge shelves that she hit with her forehead
- end of single bed
so altogether she hit her forehead FOUR times on FOUR shelves in this tiny triangle of space and ended upside down - it happened right in front of me - like it was in slow motion - difficult to get her out of there - really awkward little space - but i hawked her out of there as quick as i could - didn't even THINK about "leave her where she is, put her in the recovery position etc" - she was screaming blue murder -

from the time it took me to walk to the kitchen and sit on the sofa with her "dh, i need ice NOW" - a huge egg had appeared on her forehead, with a blue slot running down the centre. Dh took one look and said "ambulance, right now".

ambos were great, hospital paeds emergency people were good too. we were there for six - seven hours (observations for possible head injury). But in my hurry, i had packed nappies and wetbag, but no changemat or wipes. The hospital was not very helpful with that, when we needed to change a #2. I was amazed that a children's ward had no baby changing facilities. It was if i had asked in a ward where babies never were present. i found that weird. (this is the same hospital bilby arrived by c-section - CHILDREN is in the name of the hospital).

bilby seems ok now thank goodness, but she looks like a Kling-on with this egg shape on her forhead, poor love. I knew our run of good health could not last forever! but gee, i could have done without the drama! So that's how we spent Anzac Day.

must go and have a look at Aston with his TUpperware, i need a laff! ta muchly Vicki!

TaraLee - how are you today lovely?

ooohhhnnnooooooooo gigi i know how you feel with the egg :( we felt terrible when sophie fell and hit her head, dr said very lucky she ididnt split the skin, glad everything is ok and bilby will be fine.

vicky i cant access facebook :( self inposed ban!

:comfort: for you gigi and your baby girl.... oh the joys of motherhood... hospital visits are sooooo much fun - NOT! glad she is doing better now tho. scary when it happens right in front of you.

Jols, i'll see if i can share it with you via youtube, that's where it is.

Aww Gigi - there is nothing like a case of the mummy guilts to make you feel really crappy. Poor little Bilby :( How is she today? How are YOU today? Don't play that 'If only I...' or 'If only i didn't..." thats the real killer :(
I'm not too bad, thanks for asking, baby has shuffled its little self way back down again, so its a bit uncomfortable.
I just found out one of the girls in my Belly Buddy group lost her baby at 22weeks, she had to be induced. When I read her story my heart just broke. it's so unfair, i cant understand why it would happen to a baby that is so wanted when there are so many sl*ts out there who just pop them out for the money...gave me a lot to think about and be thankful for anyway

Priceless footage of Aston, Vicky, gotta come out on the 21st birthday ;)

Tara- that is so sad, i cant even begin to imagine how she must feel its not fair at all :(

Gigi- glad Bilby is alright..poor little chicken.

went to the shops today and got myself some new pjs and Emelia got heaps of new clothes as did Jack!! our big W has self serve checkouts now lol so weird.

Alright girls, thinking caps on. we've been invited to a 70's/80's party at the beginning of June. what/who can i go as? remembering the belly ;) I am so crap at these things!

We woke bilby every four hours last night, as the A n E doctor told us too, felt strange to do that when she is such a non-sleeper anyways, but it actually seemed to fit in with her feeds, so that wasn't too bad. She actually had several day sleeps today, most unlike her, so i think the extra sleeps and the constant wanting to breastfeed, are her ways of getting over the awful fall. I still can't believe she managed to contact FOUR separate shelf edges in that fall. all at the same point on her forehead.

i actually am not having the amount of mummy guilt, that i expected i would. Her room is so cramped, all the furniture is jammed together, nothing i can do about that, i know we are trapped in this place, it's not suitable on many levels, and we can't move anywhere else. i try so hard to make it as safe as i can for her. There ARE things beyond my control and i do believe the layout of her room is hazardous. don't know what else to do. i can only do so much with the money we are on. i worry all the time about the selfishness of dh and me, bringing a baby into the world when we can't afford to give her much. i don't mean trips to disneyworld and private schools, i mean a stable roof over her head and rooms bigger than a shoebox.

when it happened, i think i might have been in shock, dh was the one to say Ring the ambos, i was worried i was over reacting, didn't want the ambos to say "you're being over protective". I've had an acquired brain injury myself, so you'd think i'd be more aware, but i kind of shutdown, and just thought "cuddle her, put ice on bruise" - like i normally do when she comes a cropper. She has walked into the side of the fridge and had eggs before. But never with spilt skin in the middle before. the bruise came up in two halves, like an apricot. i keep on thinking, people will think we're silly for calling the ambulance, but the ambos and the hospital said it was the right thing to do in the situation that happened. I don't know why i am so bothered about what people think of me. she's my bub and at least she's ok now, that should be enough for me, dont' know why i'm being so silly.

Blanchie - hope you feel nice in your new pjs. It's so funny buying stuff late in pregnancy, you know it won't fit for long, but you still need SOMETHING that will fit you at the time, it's a strange feeling - limbo time in your life. i remember buying knickers at 39 weeks thinking - NOTHING fits me right now, i can't just go commando for the next few weeks!!!

Vicky - how is your dh?

Taralee - i'm thinking Farah Fawcett hairdo - the big flicks, flared trousers for 70's
Hammertime baggy pants and fluoro tshirts "Choose Life" for 80's
eyeliner for the boys e.g glam pop "spandeau ballet, duran duran
big hair
shoulder pads

Cheers Gigi - will add those to my list ;)
I get like that too, worrying about what people think of me and my choices - and like i've said before
a) i think when it comes to your child it's better to be paranoid than blase about it
b) you do the best with what you know at the time
When evie had those night terrors the other night my instinct was 'give her cuddles, just be there for her she has to wake up on her own' but DH was really stressing and asking if we should take her to the doctor. It was only then that i thought 'what if i am wrong and its more serious than i realise?' 'what if she's been bitten or something and i should get some help'. At the end of the day i thought 'she doesnt have a fever, her breathing is fine, she's not gone cold, she's not clammy and she's not grabbing any part of her body like she's in pain'
I think you just have to go with those mummy instincts, and we all think you did the right thing calling an ambulance, i think we all would've done the same thing ;)

Have had the best day today - brought up the little chairs and table for aston from the garage, that I had wanted to finish painting (just underneath it) and DH said don't worry about it, it looks ok. Well Aston's little eyes just about popped out of his head! He started by sitting down to colour with his brother and sister, while I made playdough. then the three of them, and me and daddy played with playdough for ages! From there I decided to go surfing for some ideas to do more fun stuff. Laura and Nathan wanted me to make goop - and I couldnt remember the recipe - its been a while since I have done this toddler kind of stuff. found a recipe, and aston and I played with goop for over and hour. he was most distressed when I picked him up to put him into the bath. wanted to keep playing with it. I think later in the week we will do some finger painting. Its such a strange sensation to do be doing all these things again.... Laura and Nathan are having fun playing with him with all these sensory things as much as he is.

good thing we had such a lovely day - I absolutely HATE this time of day.... the whinging hour or two begins about 4.45....glass of bubbles in hand!!

That's great Vicky! Good stuff! I'll have to dig out all my 'hands on' activities too. I've got files and files of them somewhere...packed....

Just one i thought of just then, if you're going to do finger painting. Get some toy cars and use their wheels through the paint- makes a fun pattern
- egg yolk with some food colouring in it looks beautiful when it dries
- put some drops of paint on a piece of paper in a tray (with sides) and roll marbles/balls etc around in it so the marbles/balls roll thru the paint and make patterns
- brush a flyswatter with paint and slap it onto a piece of paper
thats all i can think of off the top of my head...but you sure did get me a-thinking ;)

thanks taralee... aston will love the ball one! he had such fun with the goop. was not impressed when I put him in the bath! his favourite thing to say at the moment is "one more"

ive been lurking just not posting!!

tara thats so sad about the misscarriage :( poor chicken.
blanche retail therapy got to love it!! how are the jarmies???
vicky theres a thread somewhere on here about kids stull like bath paint etc.. will track it down if you like! sophie loves her table and chairs, also has a tea set, so cute watching her!!
gig hope bilby's head is getting better

us, had inlws here fro brunch, MIL is staying a few nights as she has acourse here in melbourne for two days, she baby sat sophie this arvo and DH and i went to the movies and dinner, was lovely!!

Vicky -good to hear u had a great day, Emelia was sitting eating her lunch with her cousin Jasper at the little table and chairs today and i just sat there amazed at how quickly they are growing up :(

Jarmies are good, went shopping and got some new slippers too and a new v pillow omg it is so good! spent abit too much again today on the kids, cant help myself!!!

Jols - that would have been nice to go out for dinner and movie kid free, i was thinking of taking Leigh to the movies and dinner next week sometime, will be the last time for a while probably!!

2 weeks Blanche! how exciting!
where is everyone today?