Alrighty, looks like the house won't be on the market this week. In fact, we are extremely lucky we still have a house! The neighbors shed caught fire tonight and our house nearly went up in smoke.
William got up around 1.30 and was out watching telly when I heard some pops so I went to check on him. They were coming from next door but I couldn't see anything - thought the glow was just a light left on but when I looked again there were flames coming up under the eaves. I rang the fire brigade and we watched from the lounge window for a bit but then it started getting very hot so I moved W away from the window. Kept getting hotter and we started to worry so I went down to wake my brother and his girlfriend. I checked in Erin's room on the way and the window shattered (she was in our bed at the other end of the house). So I told my bro to get out, and DH was already waking A and taking W out. I grabbed E and we all went and stood on the road. It is a sick feeling in your gut watching the flames edging closer to your house - our spouting was melting and windows were exploding...
Thankfully the fire brigade came in time and wet it all down so we didn't get any flames in the house - just a bit of smoke damage and the windows. That side of the house is bubbled and melted (all my painting!!).
I think apart from blinds and curtains that Erin's mattress is the only thing we lost (smoke and water). We are sooooo freaking lucky!! Even one more minute and there would have been flames in the house, 5 more minutes and we would have lost nearly everything.

So I guess I won't need to wash those windows tomorrow lol. And my bro gets out of painting the roof for now. Feeling very lucky right about now.

ETA, not an April fool's thing lol