Pandora, sorry to hear about the need for reconstructive surgery do you mind me asking is it due to a prolapse. I was told after Jack that I have a rear wall prolapse, my ignorant male dr was most unhelpful when I asked what I should do etc. My middle child who was 4040gms was the cause of all my damage I think. Must say I do bear that in mind when thinking about another one.

Sarah: 2 to 3 years isn't really too big a gap. I must say I have really enjoyed the age gap between Lewis my second son and Jack, their almost 21/2 years between them and it has been very nice, Lewis whlst not quite toilet trained was quite independant in many other ways and it made life a lot easier, the 16 months looking back a lot of work, that being said they are both great friends now