Bea, my friend had a pretty nasty prolapse, hers was due to tissue degradation from a very early menopause. She has been working with a gynae for a while and has had therapy using some sort of electric device to stimulate the muscles (I think - it involved sitting on some sort of pad thingy for however many minutes a day). I'm just mentioning this because perhaps there are other options you could pursue before opting for surgery.

Bea you don't mention where you are living, perhaps you could ring the women's information line in your state, find out where the main women's health clinic is, and speak to them about specialists in your area who are known to be good. They often get recommendations from women about doctors who are sensitive to the needs and emotional state of women - which will be just as much a part of your healing as any physical treatment. Also it might be a really good time to look into some counselling around your first birthing experience as it sounds like you still have some pain there. Often the body doesn't heal until the trauma is released.

Good luck on your healing journey, I hope you are able to find supportive health workers who can help you with this with the sensitivity and skill that you deserve!