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thread: Hospital visitors after birth

  1. #19
    Registered User

    Aug 2004
    NZ
    2,554

    I said no visitors for #1 and #2 in hospital. We were also pretty strict with people coming over for the first week or so after the event. Both times people came in, and it annoyed me cuase I left a message with the desk no visitors.
    The problem isn't them coming - its how long they stay for. My BIL and SIL came with their 3yo, and stayed for 90 mins!!!!! All through this I was having massive afterpains, and actually just wanted to sleep. It sucked, and I'm still a bit bitter about it, but what can you do.

    So I'm all for being upfront with people and saying - look nows not a really good time forus. Its unsettling enough wiht a toddler and a baby, people wanting to cuddle the newbie just make things harder sometimes.

  2. #20
    Registered User

    Sep 2005
    In the middle of nowhere
    9,362

    I think it's a great idea Jacqui.
    My IL's came well before visiting hours right when i wanted to have a shower. In fact I had just stood up and had that massive blood flow after a csec and they wanted to come in! Like hell! Then they said, oh we'll just take the baby then....over my dead body.
    I will be fighting my DH not to tell them until the day after next time, but they are not coming like that again. Then they were there ever visiting hours all visiting hour for the next week! I was really sick and they never gotany subtle hints so next time I will be about as tactful as a tonne of bricks.

    I really like Fletch's idea though and have saved it to remind me.

  3. #21
    angel_eyes Guest

    See I wouldn't mind so much if people just came to visit quickly and left, but with the inlaws and the strangers (to me) who came to visit they stayed longer than visiting hours went for.

    Then when some people were leaving they'd bump into others that were just arriving and decide to stick around.

    Your opinions are all very helpful. :-)

  4. #22
    Registered User

    Oct 2006
    Geelong, VIC
    75

    When it comes right down to it, it's up to you and how your feeling after the birth.
    I know when I had Kayla I loved having visits from family and friends but after I had Liam I wasn't in the hospital that long (only 24 hours) so I had family and friends over at the house. With Willow I told my DH to tell family and friends that they could come up the next day but after that could thay please give us some space as we needed time to get our heads around Wilow being born that early and I would ring them when I got home.
    However you play it I'm sure or family and friends will understand and respected your wishes.
    Good luck.

    Raven

  5. #23
    Registered User

    Oct 2004
    Caroline Springs,Melbourne
    1,531

    I loved having visitors although I was glad hospital had visiting hrs so we did have time to get to settle in to everything.
    You wouldnt have been able to keep everyone away from the hospital after DS was born, but he was the 1st child.

    I would hope everyone would be just as excited with bubs #2

  6. #24
    Registered User

    Nov 2004
    Giving the gift of life to a friend..
    4,264

    I loved having visitors too, but I know heaps of ppl came when I had Maddy, but no aunts, cousins, great grandpa's etc came with Indah... They all came in the next week or 2 at home after her birth... But I had maddy stay with me on my bed all day whilst in the hospital as she just laid next to me & we'd cuddle up on the oh so small bed & sleep in each others arms & when Indah would wake Maddy was with me (dh was organising his new motorbike & Maddy was on school hol's & we had never been apart so it was an extremely emotional time for Maddy & I being kept apart!) So for the 3 dyas in Hossy It was nice just Me, Maddy & Indah & Dh would pop in & bring us goodies.. Then Mum, Dad & my closest friends popped in too...

    This time other thn Mum, My Aunt & Dh being with me in labour noone will be visiting as we are in the FBC & go home within 24hrs so I will let them know they can see us at home in a few dyas time!!!

  7. #25
    Registered User

    Jan 2005
    Down by the ocean
    6,110

    I think the novelty wears off for everyone after you have had 1 child LOL. well it happened in my case.
    Happened here too Kat lol!

    Maybe you can get DH to let people know when he calls to announce the arrival that you want them to call and speak to you first before visiting so that you don't become innundated all at once.

    I had a few vistors but was lucky one left as onother was arriving most of the time.
    The girl I shared with for the first two nights had so many visitors they could barely fit behind her curtain and I had to wheel Calebs crib around the other side because some moron kept bumping into it. Then I had to walk through a group of them to get to the loo :eek: I felt kind of sorry for her.
    Thankfully I went to a private room after that.

  8. #26
    Registered User

    Jan 2007
    Adelaide, SA
    295

    My SIL had her baby 6 months before me and her parents sat in the room through the whole labour then sat outside the room while she had the C-section at 2am!!

    There was no way I wanted that and my in-laws would say to my parents 'see you at the birth'.......HA, I dont think so!!

    So a couple of weeks before Maya was due I tactfully said to my MIL that we will call them from the hospital once she was here and let them know when to come in as I wanted to have the first couple of hours with our daughter to ourselves. She couldnt exactly say anything against it, so they waited for the phone call Maya arrived at 2.15pm and we rang around 5pm, I was showered and refreshed by the time they got there:biggrin:

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