thread: How many children is enough?

  1. #1
    sammoran Guest

    How many children is enough?

    :-k I have three lovely children: 8 boy, 5 girl and 1 girl. But I still don't feel like I have finished my family. My husband is uncertain, but then I had to talk him around for each of the others as well! So I guess that as I am the one to carry and give birth I need to be sure what I want first. How many children do you think are enough?

  2. #2
    Tigergirl1980 Guest

    However many you want

  3. #3
    Registered User

    Mar 2005
    G.Waverley
    537

    Honey, Im going through tthe same thing trying to decide wether or not to go again.....

    Having had 2 miscarriages in 3-4 months. Anyway your post I've had mine... But if you feel in your heart that you've not finished and I do understand that BELIEVE ME..... so if you want more and feel that you've not finished then I say GO FOR IT. O

  4. #4
    Registered User

    Aug 2004
    Adelaide
    238

    This is a very individual decision IMO - if you want more then do it, I reckon

  5. #5
    my4girls Guest

    Here's the way I(we, actually, dh agrees) look at it: if you have another one even though you aren't totally sure, you definately won't regret it, but if you don't and you aren't totally sure, then when it's too late you may have major regret! We were done after #3, I knew it and so did dh, I can't explain how but we just knew we didn't want anymore. Well, along came our "surprise" and she was born in late november, 2005. Now we are so in love with her and enjoying her so much that we are actually thinking about #5 I think with the first three being so close (2 years, 9 months from the first to the third) we were so exhausted of all things baby that the thought of ever doing that again was out of the question, but when #4 was born #3 was all ready herself almost three, so we had a break from the work of babies enough to enjoy the pure sweetness of them. My opinion, and it's only my opinion, is that if you think you might want another then you definately do Good luck deciding!

  6. #6
    Registered User

    Nov 2004
    Western Australia
    2,300

    Some great points have been made here. We actually had a vasectomy after our 3 girls...all 2-21/2 years apart comfortable in our decision that we were happy with our family as it was. We regretted our decision probably a year later and went back for a reversal just over 2 years ago and conceived our gorgeous little man Sammy. He is such a treasure..and like my4girls has said you can enjoy the sweetness of babydom all over again. If you arent feeling like its enough then maybe you would be happy with more. My husband has suprised me just this week in saying he wouldnt mind having one more :shock:

    Jo

  7. #7
    Debbie Lee Guest

    I agree with Bec - how ever many you want!
    I take my hats off to all those Mums out there that have had/ want to have more than a couple of kids. It's SUCH a hard job (though the most rewarding!).
    I honestly don't know if I could cope with more than 2... I think I'm too selfish.
    Everyone's personality is different tho!
    I have 3 younger sisters and I am sooooo glad that I have them. Being part of a big family can be such a wonderful experience - I have 3 best friends that I can count on for absolutely anything!

  8. #8
    Registered User

    Dec 2005
    In Bankworld with Barbara
    14,222

    My god, It's like I'm reading about myself. My Dh is also unsure at the moment, but I know that if I don't, I will regret it, but I also wonder how I will cope with 4 children.

    I don't really know how you know if you are finished, I suppose you just feel satisfied inside.

  9. #9
    Registered User

    Feb 2005
    out and about
    1,068

    I have 4 and we were "finished" after 3!! but if you want more go for it. That being said, I am definately "not" complete, but DH is DEFINATELY finished, so in the true form of compromise, I am hanging up my baby days,( would keep going for ever otherwise I think LOL)
    Good luck to making the decision!!!

  10. #10
    Registered User

    Oct 2004
    melton, victoria
    1,891

    wow,this is information that i am going to take on board,i also didnt want any more after 2 but decided 7 years later that i wanted just 1 more,and now can you beleive it i want another one,and because i feel this way i probably will,dh is all for it aswell but we are the same,could we cope with another???
    nikki

  11. #11
    Registered User

    Oct 2005
    Kingaroy, QLD
    244

    I say follow your heart. DH and I agreed to have my tubes clipped while I was in having my c section with this baby only because if you have 4 you have to move up into people mover cars and also depending on the sex of you children you need to have extra rooms in the house. You don't want to regret not having another if you really feel like you family is incomplete. I feel mine is incomplete without a girl but it is too late now I have had my tubes done.

  12. #12
    Registered User

    Mar 2006
    Brisbane
    1,731

    I am pg with no. 7 and we thought we were finished after no.4. If you feel like you want another one go for it. You never regret it once you hold them in your arms.

  13. #13
    kath Guest

    Smile

    This situation sounds so much like me right now. After little miss 3 came along i thought i had had enough but i tell ya the little buggers grow on ya my 3 girls although very much a handful at times 11/3/2 are the best thing that is in my life. I know that i am not done you just know in your heart people say that im crazy i know that im not and like the others ladies have sad if you dont you will regret it. Late last year i m/c and it has been hard to concieve again very emotional i try to tell myself that if i dont have anymore i will be ok but i know in my heart that i wont. So my point is go for it i am let your heart love a little more it will only ache forever if you dont.

    love and hugs
    kath

  14. #14
    Registered User

    Jul 2004
    5,756

    I would just go with what your instinct is telling you to, because if you have another then you defiantly will not regret it at all. Before i had ym first i always wanted 2 maybe 3 children, now that i am pregnant with #2 i want 4-5 and so does DF.

  15. #15
    Registered User

    Sep 2004
    Sydney's Norwest
    4,954

    Taking the step from 2 children to having my 3rd was a big one. I had a 7 year gap. The step from 3 to 4 was more like a leap. We had to buy a van and even move for the extra space. BUT in saying that, they are totally worth it.

    I would love to have another baby. I always thought after I got my little girl I would be complete, but there is still something in me that wants more. Maybe I'm just a glutton for punishment. My problem is that DH definately doesn't want anymore. He says if I didn't have the 2 older boys (my children) then he'd think about it. But it's not like I'm getting rid of them for a new baby.

    If you are both undecided think about it hard. Once your baby is here you can never go back - nor will you want to.

  16. #16
    Registered User

    Jul 2005
    Sydney
    7,896

    I'm not in the position atm of deciding whether we've finished our family, since we've just had DD#1, but before I had her we always talked about having 2. As soon as we were home with her we looked at each other and said if we won the lotto we'd have half a dozen!!

    Now, I don't think we'll go that far, and depending on how we go with each child will probably affect our decision on whether we've finished or not. I know in my heart that I won't want to stop at 2 and that #3 is almost a certainty. DP can't believe how excited I am at the thought of going through pg and birth 2 more times but he loves being a dad so much he won't take much convincing!! LOL

  17. #17
    Registered User

    May 2004
    1,451

    I agree with Bec too as many as you want, it is a personal choice and only one you and your DH can make. For us personally we will probably have 3, I would love 4 or maybe 5 but financially i don't think we could do it unfortunatley.

  18. #18
    Registered User

    Feb 2004
    Adelaide SA
    498

    I always wanted a big family, say 4/5 kids, but pregnancy and i don't mix, and i'm having such a hard time with this pregnancy that i've decided that this will be the last or aleast have a 5/6 year gap between this baby and any future ones if we decide that it's what we both want.