I'm very sorry to hear what you went through, you must of been trying to push yourself through the table to get away!!

I got my checkup too, my doctor wanted to check since I was there for Maya's 6-8 week check. I had a episiotomy and have healed wonderfully, I even had my pap smear which was overdue because of my pregnancy. I would be going to someone different if thats possible or just plainly tell him that he hurt you last time and would appreciate a bit more delicate 'handling'.