I haven't read everyones posts but here is my opinion.

I was told that tears heal quicker than episiotomy because epis usually go through muscle and skin whereas if you tear it's usually just the skin. I tore with my first, 2nd degree and it healed in about 3 weeks. I also had a 2nd degree tear with my second but it wasn't anywhere near as bad, it healed in less than a week.

i also would rather tear because while birthing i never knew i tore until they told me after the birth. If i had to have an epi i'd be scared because i'd know about it, IYKWIM?