Sorry for the morbid topic, but this has been going around in my mind for a few days now and I'd like some other perspectives on it. So, here goes.

I always thought I'd be cremated. I don't want a grave site and for people to feel like that's the only place they can 'visit' me. And where would it be? In my home town, where some family is? Where we live now? What if people move away? I don't like the idea that it's not forever. Eventually my plot will be needed and what do they do with me then? So I figured with cremation, friends and family can spread the ashes or whatever and remember me wherever/whenever/however.

Then my Mum asked me what I "believe". The topic came up because she loosely subscribes to Christian beliefs but I don't believe in a God as such - not the way she does anyway. She wanted to know what I think happens to our souls when we die because she believes in Heaven. I told her I believe that our energy is returned to the earth when we die, just like when any other living thing dies. The body nourishes the land and plants around it, and our soul, or energy has been... kind of used... because energy doesn't last forever. So it goes back to the earth.

As I was saying it I thought it sounded kind of silly. And then I realised it doesn't match with being cremated. If I'm cremated I'm taking away from the earth, aren't I? I won't be nourishing anything. It kind of feels like a real dilemma to me, what do I do?

The thing is, my 'spirituality' is quite fluid. I'm open to new ideas, but I know what I do and don't believe, yanno?

I'm really not sure how much sense this is making, but I'd love some opinions!