I birthed my daughter yesterday 16/3/15. She was 15 weeks and 3 days. She had a massive cystic hygroma that was blocking her airway. I was so scared when I was in labour with her but the midwives and my OB was amazing, in the end she came quickly and the midwife held her in me for 15 mins until my most fantastic OB was able to come to deliver her. Unlike my 2 term births where I had epidural and felt nothing near the end this time I felt everything! Both my husband and I felt and heard the pop of my waters breaking and then I just knew when she was about to arrive. As devastated as I am I am so glad I felt every pain of birthing her as I won't have many memories but that will stay with me forever.

She was tiny, she fit in my hand and was 15.5cm long. She weighed 105grams and her head was 10cm. Her feet and hands were perfect including her teeny fingernails. Her cystic hygroma was obvious but didn't take away from her beauty. She looked like my husband as do my other kids. I wish I knew what colour hair she would have had.

I feel like I will never feel normal again as my heart is shattered and I don't know how I will recover. I miss her so much it physically hurts. I love her just as much if not more than my other 2 children and I hate seeing them grieve too.

Ava Grace you will not be forgotten.

(Mods delete if not allowed )To raise awareness of her rare condition I have started a blog which documents her life and death. It is Ava Grace - Journey with a Cystic Hygroma in Utero