[[COLOR="rgb(153, 50, 204)"]Hi, I am 20 years old and when i had just turned 19 I fell pregnant with my first baby and first bf. After the first 3 months everything was fine with the pregnancy. I had a miscarriage at 14 weeks. I was told by the doctor it couldn't have been prevented. But he also said it was most likely caused by all the stress I was under. my parents were trying to get me to have an abortion (which I am totally against) my bf was pressuring me to move in with him, even though we didn't have anywhere to go, or any money, his parents were trying to tell me what i had to do, I just had people trying to put their opinions onto me and I couldn't take most of it considering everyone I loved was telling me something different and confusing the hell about of me. I knew in a way we weren't in any good position to raise a child, but it was my child and I had to try. After the miscarriage I felt like I was alone, my bf got so violent I had to leave him, my parents had the "I told you so" attitude and said it was a message from god to say it wasn't the right thing for me to do. None of my friends could help because I hadn't really told them for fear they would outcast me as one of those silly teens that get pregnant and don't take precautions or whatever (my friends were really mean shallow people and I don't see them anymore) Right now it's been nearly a year since the miscarriage and this is the first time I've spoken about it. My new bf of nearly 9 months wants to help me through it, and I'm glad he is. But i miss my baby even though I never got to hold it, kiss it, say i love you, or watch it grow up. I feel it's my fault that I didn't do my job as an expecting mother to protect my baby, and I'm still angry at everyone for doubting the fact that I would be able to care for and provide for my baby when it was born.
How do you get over this stuff, and when does it stop hurting so much??? Where did you all get your support??[/COLOR][/COLOR]