I have just found you all, it is so comforting to know I am not alone. Your stories are so sad, I feel my loss is small compared to the pain many of you have been through. I have just lost the baby who would have been my number 5. I am lucky to have four boys from for pregnancies with no previous losses. I confidently believed that as I had done it before there wouldd be no problem. I knew something wass wrong from the start but i tried to believe he would be OK. At 10 weeks 4 days I had a slight bleed, two days later at the ultra sound I was told, 'I'm so sorry but there is no heart beat'.. those words will haunt me forever. I decided to let nature take its course, this was so hard. I had help from my herbalist which moved things along. Then strangely I had a normal 'labour' and 'birth' including waters etc...he was so tiny. I buried him under a plant in his own special pot, I have a baby ring which I wear, but people find it hard to understand that despite the fact we lost him too soon he was to us our child.
The poems i have found on the forums have had me sobbing again, but I am going to use one to add to his pictures.
I am desperate to try again, scared and feel guilty that I shouldn't try to replace him.
Thank you for your stories, it helps to know that we can remember our babies no matter how short a time they are with us.