Hugs to you BG - I am sorry you had to say goodbye again.

It's time to take the bull by the proverbial horns! Yep it's a drive, yep it's probably costly but so are all of these losses - they are costly to your heart - your beautiful heart is breaking and your arms are empty. Dr S is not God - he is but a mere man () He may have some insights - he may not. He will not and dos not make false promises or grandiose statements. He is a really nice man - really nice. His passion is helping women to fulfil their family dreams.

It sounds lke you have the accomodation sorted with Willow and Michelle. And the team here encouraging you on!

What I know is that we don't have all the answers. I say it often and I will say it again - one day there will be a name for what I have and what many of the women who cross our paths here on BB have. It's something. Our babies don't just die for no good reason. I have pieces of my heart missing that died with each of my babies - those missing pieces still ache. I don't want to see a heart hurt that can perhaps be helped.

What you need to do is get to writing down a very very comprehensive history. Right from childhood - any funny diseasaes, rashes, aches, swellings etc. Any family history of any of these types of things and the obvious arthritic type illnesses etc. Even down to constant headaches etc.

Write as much as you can. Send it to him via email before you go (see I have you there already! ).

YOur FS. MY love anyone who is affected so deeply by a second opinion scares the crappola out of me. We all need to be open and accountable. None of us have all the answers - that includes doctors. He may be nice - but you have to feel heard. You have to feel as though he/she is open to suggestion. Your careprovider no matteer how many important sounding degrees he/she has is employed by you. You interview them - you need to know that you are heard, cared for and that your questions are answered and researched. Yes there are many a fine doctor who won't like it - I scratched them off my list. I kept doing that until I found someone who listened with her heart and her head. She didn't poo poo anything. She listened. I now have my Imogen after saying goodbye 6 times. (I purchased 4 papers written by Dr S prior and wanted a doctor who would adopt his protocol).

Sending you all my love and support.