What date do you use for your angel?

[{sarah}]

I see lots of the angel mum's have dates in their signatures & I wonder which one you use? For us there is a potential for three days - actual death (around 01/01/10), when we found out (07/01/10) and the date of the D&C (11/01/10). I'm more inclined to use the date of the D&C for some reason, I think maybe because that's when bub was taken forever.

What do you use?

[Rach75]

I have always used the date of m/c or when I knew, with my 4th loss I found out on the 1st nov d/c was 2nd nov bub had passed about 1 week earlier so I would use the 1st nov HTH...

[PumpkinZulu]

for bubs 1 @ 8 and a half weeks, I used the date of death, as the d&c was done the same day. Bubs 2 was a chem preg so I used the day I got af. Bubs 3 was harder...it was 7 weeks since my lmp, but I had been testing for a long time and hadn't gotten a BFP, so I thought I must have O'ed a week or so later than I thought. I used the day of death again. Hth

[JCE0810]

for my angel as it was a missed miscarriage i used an approximate date of death (4weeks prior to finding out) for the date in my signature, but i will also remember the day/date we found out and the day/date i had the D&C done. It's important for me to remember all 3 dates.

[luna moth]

I go with the day we found out, because that was the day the world fell down. d & c was the next day, so not much difference anyway.
I think it's pretty much up to you. No one's ever going to dispute it or think you're wrong.

[kellym]

I think its a very personal thing and only you will know whats right for you.

My D&C's have always been the day after I found out about each loss and the actual date that bubs passes has been hard to pinpoint but I'm monitored quite closely, so it was always within a week. I tend to remember the date of the D&C too for some reason, I think as you said, becuase that's when bub was actually taken away forever.

Kel xxx

[mummy2chloe]

i used the date i had D&C, cos for me that was the day my little bubba g was taken from me even though scans had shown it had happend days before.

i am so sorry sarah xoxox

[Tanya]

It's hard, Sarah. But my m/c occurred naturally do I use that day, almost like a birthday iykyim. It's hard to now exactly when they passed because we all know u/s isn't 100% and for all we know growth may have slowed in the end so it may not be a good indicator of exact death... Well they are my thoughts anyway.

(((hugs)))

[Glamourcide]

I use the day bub left me - Christmas Eve. The cramps started the night before, but I didn't realise I was losing it until the next day when I passed several clots and continued bleeding for about four days.

RIP to all the little angels, and my heart goes out to all the mummas who didn't get to keep their precious ones.

[Kerrin]

I use the day our daughter was born (she was stillborn @36 weeks).

I don't like to use the day we found out because it was Christmas Eve & the holidays are already emotional enough I've found & I don't like to use what would have been her due date cause I have a friend who's son was born around the same time our angel should have been. I find that just makes me look at his son & think, Ashley should be that age too.

I say just pick whichever date feels more comfortable for you & for whatever reasons you feel. For me, like so many others, I chose her birth/death date cause that was the night when it all seemed finally real. None of it really seemed to feel like it was happening until I was induced & gave birth to her.

[forshelby]

I like this thread. I've been wondering the same, actually.

Call me crazy if you like, (used to it! lol) but I remember all 3 relevant dates. Date of positive test 03/02/08, Date of actual loss 29/02/08, and finally E.D.D 13/10/08.

What's spooky, and I only just realized this, is that my mother also had a baby which was due on 13/10/74. He made it, and turned out to be my big brother. I just thought that was strange that two women in the same family had managed to get an EDD exactly the same. Co-incidence or not? Hmm.....

[{sarah}]

Well it turns out the date we found out has the most impact, I was quite upset when 1 month went by, but the few days after when it was 1 month from the D&C I was ok.

I wish I didn't have dates Lulu, for some reason I have a memory like an elephant for dates & numbers. I can tell you the date the baby was conceived, date I did my HPT, date we found out bub was gone & how many weeks I was as well as the date of D&C and the due date. I can remember the same for my two munchkins too though