No worries Fiona! Your 'rambling' has helped a lot! I definitely agree about the whole keep her in the loop stuff. I have asked my dad (his side of the family) to let them know how we feel. That way we can know for sure whether plans have been made. At this point I don't even know whether the likelihood of it being terminal has even been acknowledged. I am hoping for her sake there is someone who she can go to who she is close with from her own country as I can just imagine what an upheaval it will all be for her already let alone moving to another country. But we needed to put it out there so she at least has some options. Your situation sounds pretty complicated. I hope it all turns out well for you guys!