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Thread: How do you go about....

  1. #1
    kirsty Guest

    Default How do you go about....

    How do you go about starting the adoption process?

    I would love any information that people could pass on as this could become a serious consideration for us in the not to distant future.

    Thanx heaps for any help that anyone can give us.


  2. #2

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    Kirsty... I had a look on the net.. i think i just google searched adoption in NSW.. maybe you could try 'adoption in Victoria'... I know babyamour - has an adopted son, you could possibly pm her, but she lives in NSW so the laws would be different.. but she would be able to tell you the basics...

    Good luck and what a wonderful thing for you to do....

    Leisa x

  3. #3

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    Kirsty, the first step is to get into contact with the Adoption and Permanent Care Team at your local Department of Human Services. The most important thing that you will need is a caring and understanding social worker. They will come out and give you some counselling, and provide a report. If everything is okay, you will be placed on a waiting list.

    The length of time that you will spend on the waiting list will depend on whether you want a local or international adoption. Locally, the birth mother can choose the adoptive parents, so it's really a lot like a raffle. If you choose international adoption, the time will depend on the country from which your intended adoptive child will come from. There are varying times, China, Korea and India seem to be the "quickest".

    Once the child comes to live with you, you will need to complete the legal requirements for an adoption, which is contained in the Adoption Act. It will involve another homestudy, together with a number of legal documents, to be filed in the County Court of Victoria in your local area. I think the County Court sits at Warrnambool but I'll have to check that!

    Best wishes and if you need more info, let me know.

  4. #4

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    DHS will be able to put you in the right direction for you, I just looked at some of my paperwork and the central number on it is 1300650172. We were dealing with the Adoption & Permanent Care team and now more specific we are in the Infant Adption Program. We are in the east of Melbourne so I am not sure if there is a department closer to your area. I know the people we first started talking with were in Box Hill.

    I have been searching all over the net/forums for peoples stories and gathering of more information but it just seems like adoption is something people don't really like to talk about. I intend on posting as much as I can about our journey so that others in the future may have some of the simple questions answered, that I have had trouble getting.

    How wonderful and exciting you are heading down this path.

  5. #5

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    caro, I will look for those books, thank you. I am reading a couple of others at the moment about others journeys and am keen for anything to be recommended as I want to absorb as much as possible.

    One of DH & my best friends (actually we are more like family) is adopted and his relationship with his parents is truely inspiring. We have watched as he has grown up & eventually met his birth mother but the relationship he has with his parents is just beautiful.

    We are very prepared for the whole process and whether times are easy or times are hard, it will all be worthwhile as it is for our family.


  6. #6

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    Caro, thank you so much again for talking to me so openly about this and directing me to some really wonderful resources, it's what I have been looking for!

    DH and I have always talked between us about how important we feel it will be to be very open and honest with our child about how they came to be our child from the very beginning. I have come across some really lovely childrens books that share the some sentiment that the book your parents gave to you did.

    I think I will be able to understand & relate in a small way about how this child that comes in to our lives will feel sometimes. My father is not someone who has had too much to do with my life since I was a young girl, I don't even think of him as a father really. But I have a step-father who has treated me as one of his children. He has been more a father than the man who is biologically connected to me ever has. But I have also struggled at times in my life with sense of belonging and just being different to the others in my family.

    We don't feel there is any shame involved with adoption at all. We want to talk about it and share this journey as much as possible. When the time comes that someone gives a baby to us, we want everyone to know how our baby came to be our baby. We tell everyone about what we doing and whilst all are so supportive & happy for us, some people do react in a shocked way. My MIL was someone who did, the first thing she said was "Oh don't worry about that, you'll get pregnant in Europe next year" and we just said "No we could not be happier about adopting, this is what we are doing".


  7. #7
    kirsty Guest

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    Thanx for all the great info passed on in here.

    As yet we are unsure if we will go ahead with adoption, need to work out what lies ahead for us in so far as my medical history (with our two angel boys) & my emotional state as to whether another natural pregnancy is in the cards for us, but am just trying to consider all possibilities just in case something unexpected comes up in test results & life!

    So thanx heaps you have given us a great place to start looking.

  8. #8

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    As another adult adoptee - I'm in agreement with everything that Caro said ...
    It's not an easy road, but I believe openness and respect and consideration for everyone in the triad is essential in adoption.
    There are also many people who Blog about their adoption, from many different perspectives - adopted children, adoptive parents and biological parents.

    Good luck with everything.

    alex

  9. #9

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    What sorts of things get factored in when they decide to put you on the list or not? Do they look at marital status, income, assets etc? Do you need to do parenting classes or prove you are capable?

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