Autism/asperger's signs..hope this might help

[maz]

Christy is about one of the best chickies you could have to lean on hon..... which reminds me I must ring her lol
well done on taking the steps to a little understanding for yourself. Its bloody hard hon but it will be so rewarding in the end.

[Glamourcide]

Thanks for posting this, Maz... my friend's 2-year-old DS has just been diagnosed as 'severely' autistic (whatever that means) and has been showing all these symptoms and more pretty much since birth (he didn't even want to come out of his mum's belly lol, she went two weeks overdue and the induction failed, he refused to budge so she had a c-sec). The sad thing is that his dad and grandparents flat-out refuse to believe there's anything 'wrong' with him and are forever berating my friend for her 'bad parenting', accusing her of deliberately holding back his development in order to get attention and sympathy for herself. She's the one who has been fighting long and hard to get someone to tell her how to help her little man, and even though her (now ex) partner was with her at the latest doctor's appointment, he still thinks she's somehow at fault and that there's really nothing so odd about him anyway. Even his parents are now in on the act - they're shirty that a diagnosis has said their grandson isn't 'perfect' and are now demanding that my friend give them back his cot, changetable, clothes and toys that they've bought him, etc etc... pair of ****s.
I wish I could print Maz's post out and give it to him, try and get him to wake up to himself and admit that his gorgeous little man needs help, not denial, but obviously it's not my place to stick my nose in. All I can do is support my friend and try to help her as best I can. I don't know what the future holds for them, but I hope he can get the treatment he needs without his father and grandparents interfering because they're 'ashamed' of him.

[maz]

What a truely wonderful friend you are Donna. Its so heart warming to know that a mum who is going through this has such a wonderful support and friend.

Denial is easier sometimes then dealing with what is right infront of their nose, and blame often follows suit . Friends who dont understand that your life must revolve around this little person or have an unwillingness to 'put up' you or you child turn and walk away 9 time out of ten. Its extremely heart warming to know that your friend has you to turn to when she needs it.

I hope that your friend is aware of what is available to her in regards to career payments and respite also. Although most of us mum'/s with childrne with special needs are very proud to say we can do it on our own, we do need a break of some sort and if there isnt a significant other there to help...respite can do wonders.

your put a huge smile on my dial

[~ Mylitta ~]

Maz, my heart goes out to you, and to all those in similar situations. I have not been diagnosed with anything on the autistic spectrum (although my brothers' psychiatrist suspects ADHD...), but I have lived with others on the spectrum since I was a child. Two of my brothers were diagnosed with ADHD as children. The diagnosis came when they were about 3-4 years old, after we had gone through numerous other avenues to work out what was "wrong" with them. These included naturopath, counselling, dietitian, occupational therapy (the coordination stuff...), chiropractors and so on. They are now 21 years old, and since their initial diagnosis there have unfortunately been many that have followed. One brother is "lucky" and only has ADHD, Asperger's and mild OCD. The other brother is not so fortunate and has been diagnosed with ADHD, Asperger's, OCD, Bi-polar and something else that I'm forgetting. I believe their current diagnosis is sort of being collectively classed under the term "Pervasive Developmental Disorder NOS".

It's been a long (sometimes rough) road for them but they are doing well. The less affected brother has completely a tafe course, and the more affected brother is now working full time in a great job at Connex.

Just to add to the excitement though, my eldest DSS has ADHD. He started highschool this year and is unfortunately having a bit of a tough time. He gets into trouble quite a bit both with the teachers, and with the other students. He just has trouble knowing when he's taking things too far, and also tries too hard to be "cool" around other students and gets himself into bad situations. Luckily at heart he's a good, loving boy and we know that he'll get through this just fine with love and support from us.

Something that I've learnt along the way is the value of having a support system for these kids that can be trusted. Good school teachers are an absolute essential. One of my brothers had a teacher at primary school that was dreadful, and he battled with extreme low self-confidence for years to come. We've been really careful to make sure that my DSS's teachers understand his condition and are very supportive. We are in touch with his teachers constantly and his teacher this year has been an absolute treasure!