L&B, I was just coming to say the same - all these different things that can happen with kids, or adults, most people say they they'd never cope. They don't know how someone can go on after whatever it is - a death, a diagnosis, whatever - but those who HAVE been through that just cope. They deal. It's part of them now.

I always thought I'd never be able to live if one of my children died, or even got seriously sick. Now it's part of my history, threaded through my future. Just like someone whose child has special needs, I've accepted it and it's just part of my day to day life. It's not as public as a child with obvious special needs, but it's still there.