what to do!!!

[melbrodhi]

ok here's my dilemma. we have got our bubs name down to 2 options. ruby and Isabella, we've had them for months now. we will choose which one it will ultimately be after she's born. we haven't told anyone the names and wont until after she's born.

my problem is my mum. she has been driving me MAD with her suggestions of names, even thou i have told her many times that we don't need any more ideas. up until now it was easy to humour her, but yesterday she ironically commented on our names (even thou i haven't told her what they are). here were her comments

Ruby (we were watching TV and one of the characters was ruby) "oh no, don't like that, too old fashioned"

Isabella "what about Isabella, you could call her Bella for short"

of all the names, she had to find ours!!! it annoyed me about Ruby cause that is definitely the forerunner and i have loved that name for years, now if we name her that i will know she doesn't like it, (but that wouldn't influence our decision if that makes sense) its just annoying to know that. i had to bite my lip about Isabella, i was REALLY annoyed she'd suggested that name, cause now i know if we name her that i am never going to hear the end of her "oh that was MY suggestion, they picked the name I liked" trust me, my mum is like that, she would be telling everyone who would listen that SHE named her granddaughter. even thou i would make sure i told her we had had that name picked for ages, but she wouldn't believe it and would insist it was HER name choice . which would absolutely peeve me off.

hope that all makes sense (sorry for the ramble). i am not going to change our name choices now (only 4 weeks to go and took us AGES to agree on names) but it has well and truly thrown me for a loop ....... would what you do?

[Poncho]

I'd stick with your names. Re: Ruby, I remember suggesting our first baby's name to my dad and it was met with much mirth! We still gave the name to our bub and it's perfect. And your mum will think so too. She might even say she liked it all along!

As for the mum suggesting Isabella, I know what you mean about if you choose it. I guess you'd need to decide if you think she'd remember it, how often you think she'd claim credit for the name, and if you think you can cope with it!

[grub17]

melbrodhi, are you sure we aren't sisters! my mum is the same. she keeps asking what names we've picked and i keep telling her we aren't saying. I ended up bluntly telling her "because we don't care for anyone else's opinion".

but nnoooo this hasn't stopped her.

Personally, I would be ditching isabella cos i just couldn't cop it. and i'm too proud and my mother would annoy the bejesus out of me with her "my name'' thing. I would start looking for another 2nd choice.

but i'd stick with ruby. bet she loves it once it's her grandchild's name!

bbrrrhhh mothers! oh hang on... we are about to enter that catergory... eeeeeekkkkk.

oh ps, my mum has listed off the names we can't have! because out surname starts with O ... so no B names "cos his initials will be BO'' OMG!!! leave me alone mother!!!

sorry for the little vent. its just super annoying hey!

[feeb]

I would still go with Ruby if that is the favourite your mum will get used to it.

Isabelle is also gorgeous name but if u have to put up with ohh i suggested that etc i wouldnt use!

[saslia]

I had the same thing when DS was born (we were not speaking when DD was born so managed to avoid it that time)

We had picked out our name and it too was one she suggested - I just listened and did not say anything.

It didn't change our mind - we just went with what we liked.

[Tiff+2]

Stick to the names you love and completely disregard anything she has said... She's had her time and was able to name her own children what she wanted and now its your turn!!!

I have given up telling my family names we like because they can be outright rude and have got me quite upset several times, and there is just no need for it. Everyone should keep their comments to themselves cuz its not their child!

Ruby would be my choice, its gorgeous and older names are definately coming back! Its beautiful and feminine!

Goodluck with it all!!

[Muppity]

In the end it is going to be her grandchild and you could call it "Shalto Fortescue Tinky-winks 3rd" and she would still think it was a lovely name.

Maybe next time she suggests a name and focus on it. Say, so you really think that "Mavis" is a really nice name, OK we will consider it, but aren't making any guarantees. That way at least she thinks that she is being consulted. And she will be focussing on that name rather than any other suggestions that she made.

[Taurean78]

Being the stubborn Taurean that I am, I would stick with Ruby! I also love Isabella but Ruby really is a beatiful name.
Apparently when I was born 31 yrs back my Nanna scoffed at the name given to me (Kate). As far as I know, it was perfectly acceptable and she sang me a beautiful song "KKK..Katy...Beautiful Katy...you're the only on that I adore.." etc up until she died last year.

Your Mum will get over it!

xxTaurean78

[willow5]

Maybe next time she suggests a name and focus on it. Say, so you really think that "Mavis" is a really nice name, OK we will consider it, but aren't making any guarantees. That way at least she thinks that she is being consulted. And she will be focussing on that name rather than any other suggestions that she made.

That could work I'd try it depending on if you think she'll remember the Isabella thing being her suggestion cos personally I couldn't stand hearing how "it was my idea" it would drive me nuts!!

Good luck!

[~ Zarava Flutterby ~]

In the end it's your baby not hers and it's your choice.

I personally LOVE Ruby and yes it's an old fashioned name but it is very in right now, who cares what she thinks.

And if you do go with Isabella you should sneakily write it in a diary somewhere, backdating it a little and say no see we wrote down our name choices months ago, well before you ever mentioned them... hehehe

My dad came out 100% and said he didn't like Ava before i had her, i said too bad it's a name i like and i'll use it if i want, it's not your baby.
He has never said it again and loves her to death and says it actually suits her... so in the long run even if they don't like the sound of it at the start they will grow to love it and your gorgeous little girl!

[Socks]

I will tell our families the sex but I refuse to tell them the names and I always say even already we have picked names. We haven't but it shuts them up. My Grandma told me she hated my sons name when I rang to tell her I had him. She gave me suggestions on other names when I was at the hospital. I said no we love it and it will stay.

Families always make it all so hard.. I would tell her she is wasting her time you picked the name months ago and it won't change. And you will tell everyone once she is born.

By the way I love both names.. I do think Ruby is really cute

[Bea06]

I totally get the Mum thing! It's infuriating!!

What about Ruby Isabella? And then you could use both names.