thread: Who's surname...?

  1. #19
    Registered User

    Jan 2009
    Central Coast

    Ive honestly never thought about giving our baby my surname. Ive always imagined it to have DP's surname.
    My Mum and Dad werent married and never got married (seperated now) and I have my Dads last name. To me its just a name I'll be changing mine if we ever get married and I dont see any problem with it but thats just my opinion
    Besides I cant even have the double-barreled name as it would be Potter-Pross! lol
    and another reason why is because I want to include DP as much as I can in the whole process and to make him feel like he wasnt just there for the making IYKWIM
    That probably didnt come out the way I intended, but my brain is absolute mush atm!

  2. #20
    Senior Moderator

    Nov 2004

    I didn't take my XH's name when we married. Our sons have hyphenated surnames, his first because it sounded better. Now we're divorced I'm glad I did it that way.

  3. #21
    Registered User

    Dec 2008

    #1 has my surname - ugly relationship with father. even though we were together i made the decision to use my surname

    #2 had his surname(different father to #1) - never gave it a second thought.

    #3 will have his surname(same father as #2)

    Im pretty attached to my surname. Im still unsure when we marry if ill takes his. If i take his ill use both until i either change #1's to df's or if that doesnt happen until #1is older.

  4. #22
    Registered User
    Add ~clover~ on Facebook

    Sep 2007

    Just for the sake of it, I'll add that we did have a range of names to use when DD1 was born.
    DH's birth certificate had his mothers maiden name on it. He used this til he was 8 & MIL re married. After they married he used FIL's name.
    When it came time to grow up & get licenses etc, we also had the choice of using his real father's name, even though he didn't know him.
    In the end we dicided MIL's maiden name sounded best & it was easier as well. So DH has his mothers surname, & so do our kids. We also chose that name as DH was the last generation to use the name. All his siblings had their father's name.
    So we chose that name to keep it alive as well. Now we have a son to keep it going. (Well depending on how the girls go I guess, lol).

    I also have a friend who changed her name to her step father's name when her mother re-married & she kept the name even after they divorced. When she went on to become a young single mum, she decided the best name for her DD was her step fathers name. It is a well respected name in the community & she did it to try to get away from the name that her mother & aunts dragged through the mud.
    The step father put a reply notice in the paper to let everyone know he was not, infact, the grandfather, after the congrats notice was put in. Which I think was pathetic & low, considering he had been with her mother since she was 1. But some people are just like that. (Sorry, my anger gets away with me sometimes, lol)

  5. #23
    Registered User

    Jan 2008
    SE suburbs, Vic

    DD has DF's surname because when we are married I will take his as well

  6. #24
    Registered User

    Mar 2008
    North Northcote

    Our DD has both our names. but no middle name...

    I have kept my name after we got married and never had an intention of switching. i was thinking of also going with the two last names, but then really liked the idea of our children showing our union ITMS. (when i was going to go with the 2 names for myself DH was going to change his via deed poll too LOL!).

    we went with his name first and then my name only for citizenship reasons (italy requires the italian born surname to follow directly after in order to have citizenship).

    i like it, but i think DD will hate it in the end as we both have VERY european last names and no one can get either right. ah well. LOL!

  7. #25
    smiles4u Guest


    My actual surname isn't my birth/family name as i changed it when i was 18 through deed poll ... the surname i changed it to is also known as a christian name so if i had of had a boy when pregnant the surname would have been feminine

    So, right from the beginning i knew that our baby would have her Daddy's surname

    Also i got to have our DD's middle name after my younger sister so i also thought it was only fair my DP had a name in their too

    A few of my friends were surprised i didn't give my DD's surname my own surname as it would have been more in character of me BUT i wanted to also give DD her Daddy's surname as a gift to him also as he is just the kindest & such a wonderful & gentle man

    Me too Mel (Ariemh) ... if DP & i ever married i have absolutely no intention in changing my surname to his (not to mention his surname is plain boring for me & he knows that, LOL )

  8. #26
    Registered User

    Dec 2008

    I didn't change my name when I got married. My kids have DH's surname. We weren't married when I had my first child and I wanted him to have my surname but was talked (or rather guilted) into giving him DH's name by his family.

  9. #27
    Registered User
    Add ~Serenity~ on Facebook

    Dec 2008

    When Ds1 was born i gave him my surname because i figured if we broke up i would have him the most and would make life easier...when we got married simply changed his name over and they changed the birth certificate name over too

  10. #28
    Registered User

    Oct 2008
    Canning Vale, Perth

    DD is gonna have DPs surname simply because i hated my surname growing up (its Softly)....i got teased for it and having a slight lisp let me tell you it is the hardest name to try and spell to ppl especially over the fone!! i get mail saying miss fostly or postly or softley with an E in it ooooh i hate that one....DP has a nice surname too.
    maybe if DD was gonna be a boy i might have thought about carrying on my surname as me and my siblings are the last of our name....we have no cousins or rellies with the same surname and my brother is highly disabled so will not be having kids.
    but i reallllllllly hate my surname lol

  11. #29
    Registered User

    Nov 2005
    Where the heart is

    Dusty - the idea of giving a girl my name occurred to me the other week and I flagged it with DP. He didn't seem perturbed, but then it was just an idea, not a definite plan. It's becoming a bit more concrete in my head since then, though
    I have no intention of ever changing my name. I'm attached to it for various reasons. DS got DP's surname because I didn't object to it at the time (and still don't, really), as long as he scored an Irish first name (cos the names MiL was coming up with were just horrendous to me, and then, to complete my decision, she laughed at the Irish names I suggested because she'd never heard them...normally a very open minded person, she is!!).

  12. #30
    Registered User

    Feb 2007

    i'm married, but our kids have my surname. it was dh's idea, but it's always seemed logical to me that kids have their mother's name. AND my name is long, foreign and difficult to spell! they can always change to their dad's later if they want to