thanks very much for all your replies, It's all been helpful and encouraging... he is due for his 18 month checkup next week so i'll be interested to see if the doctor has anything to say..

Dee: if i give him a bucket with sand he does play around with it a little, he has a slightly concerned look on his face while doing this and touch's it gingerly... but he doesn't cry or anything... i've never heard of sensory processing - tactile defensiveness... Do they grow out of this or is it with them for life?

anyway again thankyou all very much...