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Thread: 9 Month old bedtime separtion anxiety?

  1. #1

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    Unhappy 9 Month old bedtime separtion anxiety?

    Hi,

    Just wanting some advice. My DD is 9 months old and the past week she has been screaming HYSTERICALLY when we put her to bed - nothing has changed, we still are doing same bedtime routine of dinner, bath, bottle and bed.
    Her day sleeps are still the same, she may cry but stops within 10 minutes and is asleep, but her nights have just gone FERRAL and she is sooo distressed. Even when I sit with her and rub her head she screams although is a bit calmer when I am in the room as opposed to outside the room.
    It breaks my heart when I see her so upset.

    She has always been a terrible sleeper as has severe gastro esopogal? refux so developed very bad habits due to extreme pain. We had a residential stay at tresillian and that helped a bit, as well as being put on the bottle as she developed pain association with breastfeeding hat no ABA counsellor or lactation consultant could help with. I think when she finally was drinking enough to feel full this helped her sleep. BUT at least there were reasons for her sleep problems - ie pain, hungry etc.

    I just feel helpless at the moment. I actually had my last counselling session last week for PND as I was feeling much better and my counsellor agreed I was coping well but now I just feel like crap again.

    Is it normal for 9 month olds to just start hating going to bed at night and scream for 1-3 hours?

    sorry so long, guess its a vent as well...
    any ideas....


  2. #2

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    Hey Ery

    DD is screaming her brains out too atm! I have been rocking her to sleep for about 3 weeks now, she still get angry and tries to squirm away but isnt so sad after about 30 seconds. If DH goes near her at night she gets frantic and thrashes until she sees me....gosh that sounds terrible but you get what I mean. He can do anything at all with her except rock her to sleep or pat her head to sleep she will only let me. She also wont have a bar of him through the night and howls until she gets me. It is so frustrating because you just dont know what the hell went wrong. Sweetheart, you are doing a great job please dont doubt yourself on that, Im sure it must be a stage if they are both doing it now, especially being about 12 hours apart in age! . Maybe you could try rocking her? I had to do this at about 6months for a few weeks too and then as quickly as it started, it disappeared. I know I haven't really given you an answer but wanted you to know that you arent alone xx
    Last edited by Lily Dust; July 9th, 2010 at 09:56 PM.

  3. #3

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    Hun, I seem to recall each of my DS's going through something similar at around 9 months too. I think it is an age where separation anxiety can be a big deal. How would you feel about lying down with her until she's asleep, or co-sleeping with her for a while until things settle down. It's a phase that will pass, but it will be much easier on her (and you ) if she has lots of reassurance in the meantime.

    Take care hun

  4. #4

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    Thanks for your thought girls. I am too afraid to co-sleep incase she gets used to it and I can't get her out of my bed!! I did it last night in an act of desperation but then she just wanted to play, at least she wasn't screaming but was still awake!
    Lily - I know what you mean about DH. She just ants me at the moment which is exhausting - just hope it passes quickly!!!

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