I don't know if this will help, but you can just try not letting her do the naughty things.
DS loves to clear his high chair tray of food. So we have a plate on his tray and a cup with a little water in and we just constantly re-fill the plate and cup from a second plate and cup on the table with us.
He loves to go behind the TV, so we block it off with a chair.
We praise a LOT for good behaviour (he either tells himself "noo noo noo" when he's naughy or calls himself a "goid goy" - I think that's good boy - now).
Just a FEW little things mean we don't have to tell him off and he's happier now because we are too.
I have tried explaining that she does what she sees us do. He has seen her do it first hand. But withthe smacking he just doesn't get it for some reason.
Skye, I do get what you mean. She doesn't have the foresite to see consequences of her actions. And I have tried to tell him that too. But I must explain it to him wrong, cause he seems to think she does. He thinks she does things to annoy us and on purpose. But she just trying to learn about things.
Rhf, I have childproofed the place as much as possible. She has figured out how to get around alot of things, like the drawer locks. She can open them now- with her teeth! I try to keep things out of her reach and not let her get into things, but she's a crafty little thing! And she does the 'nooo' thing too, except for her it's 'toh tuh!' (don't touch) and a waggle of her finger. It is very cute and shows me things are getting through, we just need her to understand why, which will take more time...she is still jsut a baby!
Sweetheart - I don't have any wonderful advice for you right now because we are just starting our discipline here and it is super tough! I just wanted to say, you are due in 2 days mama! You are doing a brilliant job, little wonder that your emotions and patience are on a short string, and you don't feel like reasoning with her. Lily is probably picking up on the changes around her even if she doesn't really understand it all, and is acting out from that. You will probably find things settle a bit in the next few weeks once bub arrives and you all get into a new routine and if it is what you want, go back to reasoning.
One thing I think though is that one parent can't do one thing and the other not - there needs to be consistency and you need to be a united force so after bub comes maybe both sit down and decide how you are going to tackle it all. Good luck hun and can't wait to read your birth annoucement!
Ok, I'm not being entirely serious here, but maybe if your DH really wants to have smacking in his discipline repertoire, that surely means that it's fair game for you to smack him when he does something that you don't want him to do. The girls who posted before me have pretty much said all the sensible options that I would have come up with, and they're all much more experienced with toddlers than I am, I just have it all ahead of me -
Thanks Tan These past weeks have been hard for me. But that's no excuse to a 15mth old.
We are fairly consistent. He is being very respectful of my wishes not to smack her. BUt he often says things to her that I find hurtful. I know she doesn't understand yet, but she can tell by his tone. Maybe I'm just sensitive to it cause I experienced it but in having experienced it I know how it feels and it's not nice.
I have everything crossed that she doesn't turn into a terror when bubs comes!!
Jan, that's a comparison I ofter make to him. He thinks it's funny, but I'm serious. I don't smack him and wouldn't. So why should we smack DD?
My DH & I are the same as you.
Only we both occasionally smack. Only when its something dangerous at her age though. As they get older its more when we just get pushed too far, but we are really trying to steer clear of smacking all together atm. Its not easy. DH thinks its the way to go, I don't.
DD2 knows whats right & wrong most of the time now & will look at me while doing it & wait for my reaction with a grin on her face. She's just testing her boundaries, but they do still get very frustrating.
When my girls were about that age I used to explain why I didn't want them to do something & distract them eith something else.
DD1 was pretty easy. When they get to the picking up naughty words age DD1 started it, like they all do. I used to say 'thats a naughty word & it's not nice to say'. She stopped after a few tries & used to tell us off if we said a naughty word.
We are still working on DD2. She's not out there with it, but occasionally she'll say one. We were about to get in the car the other day & I told her to go to the toilet first. She looked at me in all seriousness & said 'I not p*ss mysewf'. I had to walk away coz I couldn't not laugh.
She really only says them to stir DD1 up though.
So that worked for us. Everytime she does something, pull her up on it & say 'no that's ouchy' behind the TV or something. Power points in our house bite.
I taught DD1 about hot by getting her to touch the outside of my coffee cup. She was 8 months old & because she knew what hot meant & as she got older if I said something was hot she wouldn't go near it.
DD2 learnt to stay out of cupboards & drawers by getting her fingers in them. Not the best way to learn!
It could be harder or easier when you have the little one. DD1 was easier as she was besotted with DD2, but DD2 was ready for DS to go back the day after he came home.
She will settle down. It may take time, but it will get better.
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These past weeks have been hard for me. But that's no excuse to a 15mth old.
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