Drawn out Bed Time - 19 months

[Miss.September]

I remember the night routine with DD1. It went on for months for us. We would put her into bed (we took the side rails off the cot because it was evident she hated that) and I'd sit on the floor beside her. I'd muck around on the laptop and rarely say anything to her, other than a gentle but firm "go to sleep, DD" if she started to play up a bit. But it would often take up until around 10pm to get her off to sleep and she would rarely allow DH to do it. It got better over time and we figured out that she would go to sleep quicker if we left the room. We did that in baby steps - we'd stay with her for quite a while and then leave, but the time we stayed got shorter and shorter.

The long nights of mucking around was also one of the reasons we stopped day sleeps. Even now, if she has a nap during the day (usually if she flakes in the car), she will lie in bed awake until 11.

But it did settle down eventually!

I reckon for now, get DH to do bedtimes. See if you can get her back into the habit of going to sleep easier. You take over on the weekends when time is a little bit freer. Try an earlier bedtime? We've gone earlier again with DD2 just recently, she's asleep just before 6.30 where it's been around 7.30-8 previously. What happens if you try to get her to fall asleep if you snuggle up on your bed and then move her? Playing music for her while she has a drink (not necessarily kid's songs either - DD2 alternates between rock ballads and dance tracks). You've probably tried all of this, but thought I'd throw it out there just in case.

I completely understand the frustration. And tiredness and lack of time for yourself. Let DH take over for now, let the frustration pass and then try again in a few days

[JLeigh29]

DS went through a brief period of resisting bedtime when he was about 2. He didn't get upset, just didn't want to lie down and go to sleep. We found consistency and no interaction was the key.

So, DH and I decided together (so it didn't matter who did bedtime, it was done very similarly each time) that we'd do the bedtime routine as normal, then we'd say something like, 'goodnight, it's bedtime now. If you talk or call out, we won't answer, we've had our cuddles, story, drink (etc) and now it's sleep time.' Then we'd tuck him in, kiss/cuddle, night music on and stand at the door (he was happy with that as that's what we'd always done. If you're normally in the room, I'd stay there). If he tried to get our attention, we'd ignore him (I'd close my eyes and semi turn my back), if he got upset we'd go in, but not pick him up, cuddle or talk to him. This was rare though. Just sit or stand there, maybe put our hand on him or in the cot, but we didn't make eye contact.

If we talked to him (that's enough, sleep time now etc) then it was like we'd pressed his 'reset' button... But when we didn't interact, he'd get bored and go to sleep much more easily and quickly. The phased passed quite quickly if that helps to know

I also read that if it was taking an hour to get them to bed, to temporarily make the time they were falling asleep their bedtime. Bring it forward by ten mins every few days til it's back where you want it.

Oh, and I agree that DH should do it for a few days to give you a break