I say go with your gut chickie. Having 2 close together is hard, and stressful sometimes - and I got an easy baby the second time round!! But its getting easier (I agree with Ali about the after 6 months it gets easier) and I love to see the kids interact - its so cute how DS does a silly dance just to make DD laugh.
At first I regretted having them so close together - DS has sleeping issues too, but they are getting better now that we have dropped the day nap - but now - its getting really fun!!
Starting to think about when I'll go for number 3 - could be sooner rather than later
Good luck with what ever you decide. Do what you think is best, don't let people pressure you into having a baby that THEY won't be helping to take care of.
Queenbee, we started trying for #2 when Darcy was 6 months old, but the universe had other plans. When she was 2 and I had just lost a bub I decided for 'us' that I wasn't doing that again and we weren't having anymore - besides becasue it was taking so long we had already been telling people that for months to get them to leave us alone.
However, someone of a higher power decided otherwise and i have 5 weeks to go before number 2 arrives.
Like you I have an extremely demanding child. She sleeps badly but hey at nealry 3 I'm just used to it now, she's not going to be small forever I figure. As she gets older I'm now more worried about how she'll settle than a new baby who will be extremely meldable.
BUT she is at an age where she understands stuff more and is able to help me. She's TT.
So with all that waffle - I went from wanting a small age gap, to not wanting more than one to being glad that there is a larger age gap. We're even planning to have the 4 we originally thought we would have.
Sometimes things have a way of working themselves out, even when they aren't how we've planned or imagined it to the enth degree.
I'll speak from a gap perspective. DD1 was 7.5 when DD2 was born and it was good. However, DD2 is now 3 and DD1 is 10 and Im finding it REALLY difficult at the moment. They are always fighting, and DD2's sleep routine (which has ALWAYS been fantastic) has gone OUT the window. I would definitely NOT wait if these are your reasons. I am really really not sure how Im going to cope.
It could be school hols and they're driving each other nuts, but I have found it's been getting more difficult.DD2 has become the most assertive and strong minded child I've ever met. I can't help think that a new baby is going to be the hardest thing ever.
so don't worry about gaps, I dont' think anyone can ever know in advance how they'll be.....
The way I made my choice is regret. I really weighed up if I didn't have another one, would I regret that and the answer was yes big time.
good luck with your decision xo
My older two are 29 mths apart. We fell pregnant when DD#1 was 20 months old. I was a bit like your DH - and i wanted them closer together, but my DH as you know is a firefighter and he wanted to study and have completed his Station officers exams....so we had to compromise. Needless to say within the first cycle of him giving us the go-ahead we got a BFP.....looking back now im so grateful for waiting....as a first time mum there were so many things i was unsure of, i was anxious about.....i found i was really, really, really ready by the time #2 did come around....it didnt hit me like a tonne of bricks so to speak..
Pfffttt to what others are saying. When you shut your door at night its YOU that has to deal with how YOU feel. If your not ready yet, thats okay. Enjoy this special time with your DD and maybe make a decision at Easter time or something.....
DS was a difficult baby at best - poor sleeper and silent reflux on meds until he was about 18mths - but we really wanted the kids to be close together so when DS started to drop feeds at about 10 months we started ttc. Ttc w Jake was first cycle success, but was also after a 4 month hiatus post partial molar pg treatment, but this time it took us ages. We had an early mc and things just weren't happening. I honestly feel it was a combo of stress and the fact that I was working too hard, not looking after myself too well and my body just wouldn't have coped there and then. We finally got an appt to see a fertility specialist, with a 4-5week wait, and the day before our appt we got a BFP.
SO I guess what I can say drawing from our experience that no matter how hard you plan sometimes the universe, your body everything else works together when it is the RIGHT time for it to happen, not when the time is right for you to make it happen IYKWIM.
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