Help!!! She won't sleep!

[MrsBexie]

Hi!

I have a 5.5 week old girl and am having issues with night time. From about 7-8pm she will not sleep!!! No matter what we do, how much we rock her, how much I feed her etc she will not fall asleep until at least 12am.

We tried bathing her, massaging her, rocking her, feeding her... Everything but she just won't hve a bar of it. I try to avoid her waking up between 7:30-8:30 hoping that if she sleeps through that time, then when she does wake for I feed I can pop her straight back down.

It is really frustrating because it when we usually have dinner. I want to spend time with DH cause he's just gotten home from work, but she won't let us put her down or do anything!! dh goes to bed around 9:30-10:30 so from then I am on my own to settle her n try to get her to sleep. And I can't let her cry it out cause 1 I don't want to and 2 she sleeps in our room and dh is in bed.
She has been like this for about 2-3 weeks.

She is on Zantac for silent reflux and I make sure she has been burped etc so no pain.

I just want her to sleep or at least be happy enough to be put down! any suggestions??

[Arimeh]

Can you sleep with her on your chest? It's not the perfect solution but I remember having to do that with DD1, who also suffered from silent reflux.

[Kazbah]

How often does she feed during the day? Maybe try feeds every 3 hours during the day for a little while, see if that settles her more during the night?

Although, having said that, I've noticed Will going through a similar pattern at about the same age. It is a wonder week so there's a lot happening in their little bodies and minds.

[MrsBexie]

Can you sleep with her on your chest? It's not the perfect solution but I remember having to do that with DD1, who also suffered from silent reflux.

She won't sleep on my chest. That's what I mean, she just will not sleep!!!! It's not that she wakes when
We put her in her bassinet, she wont fall asleep! Id be happy for her to sleep on my chest if that's what it took to keep her to sleep, I just dont know how to get her to sleep in the first place!

[helle]

Shell grow out of it, enjoy your cold dinners

But seriously, have you tried dream feeding? DS would wake at 11pm and it used to take me til 3am to get him to crash again. So I started dream feeding at 10:30 to avoid the wake up. Worked a treat, he eventually started to skip it altogether and sleeping thru.

FYI once you think you have it all sorted and they're sleeping great, 6 months hit

[BabyWrangler]

Sent you a pm hun

[MrsBexie]

If I dream feed it'll be at like 6-7 pm... Won't it then make it worse later on at night because she will want to stay awake?

Should I be trying to put more of a routine in place during the day, particularilu the morning? Cause at this stage once dh goes to work at 6am I will bring her into bed and feed side on so I can sleep, then when she grizzles i reattach her n go back to sleep until around 10:30. So the mornings aren't very structured...

[Kazbah]

MrsB - sounds incredibly similar to what we do too

[helle]

What time do you want her to be in bed by? That's pretty early! Maybe she's confused with her day and nights?

I would dream feed DS before he woke, so he wouldn't wake. So whatever time she's waking I'd feed her half hour before then put her back bed (hopefully staying asleep) so then it avoided the whole waking up thing and then having to get her back to sleep.

I'll be honest with you, I tried getting DS into a routine and it's harder than just going by them, i would get so frustrated and angry because he wasnt doing what he was "supposed" to be doing and in turn he would pick up on then and become more unsettled and it was just a horrible cycle. 5 weekers don't know what they're meant to do, only what they want to do. I know it's a PITA, but she will get there eventually. Promise

[MrsBexie]

I just want her to be able to wake up, feed, maybe stay awake for like half an hour and go back to sleep!!
I don't want her up for 5 hours fighting us to go back to sleep. She is pretty good all other times, it's just this window at night. I don't think the dream feed would work unless I Could get her just before she woke up so it was as late as possible.

[Yeddi]

I agree with Helle. I know some books say to put baby to be by a certain time but each baby is different. My first would go down at 7pm and wake twice during the night for a feed and go straight back to sleep, my second - no way. I don't even try to put him to bed until 9:00 it's just not worth it! I think you have to judge by your baby. Is she happy to be awake at this time? If you put her on the couch next to you would she happily lie there? If so, I'd just let her. I personally wouldn't start a routine at this time except a start time to the day. I have to because I have to take my DD to school, so each day has a definite start time for the household. What happens from then on (apart from school drop off) is fairly flexible.

[black_rose]

If she doesn't want to sleep don't fight it. Have you got a rocker or swing? We found that it worked wonders with our two who couldn't settle at night. We would put the rocker on vibrate and it calmed them down enough so we could eat and spend time together. Both my kids outgrew this stage by about 4 months.

[helle]

unless I Could get her just before she woke up so it was as late as possible.

What have ya got to lose?
What time does she fall asleep to start with?

[HotI]

Just go with flow. Trying to impose a routine on bub this early just makes it harder on you. When i learnt just to go with the flow it became so much nicer for all of us.

Can DH hold her for awhile when he gets home to give you a break? Can you take turns eating while the other person holds her? You can still chat at the same time. Have you tried a carrier? Is she happy to sit in a rocker or swing you can have next to you while you eat?

Are you breastfeeding? Bubs often feed often at this time as it gets them ready for when they have a bigger sleep at nighttime.

[helle]

Ooh yeah!! That's right... I used to cart DS around in a hugabub during dinner time to making witching hour a little more bearable.

[FabFiona]

Your post reminded me that my DH and I ate dinner in shifts for about 2 months. That was also a horrid time for my wee man.

I didn't bother with any routine until about 3 months. I found (and still do really) that going with his rhythm and signs was much easier. Tired signs = sleep, hungry = feed. Watching the clock used to stress me out.

Good luck and try and enjoy this precious time.

[HotI]

Many books will tell you that babies have an hour awake time or 90 mins or whatever. My baby certainly didn't read these books. From when she was tiny, she had much longer awake times.

Another couple of things that we tried and had some success with was giving bub a bath to relax her, or her having a shower with her Dad that also gave me 10 mins to rest. Or we put bub in a carrier and the 3 of us went for a walk around the block. This gave us a chance to just chat while we were walking, and the fresh air was good for all of us- sometimes it even put her to sleep .

[boomba]

Adjusting life for your new baby is really hard. She is still so little maybe let her lead for the moment and gently bring in routine like feed bath and bed at a certain hour. I know how much you are probably craving time with your husband but this time is only short with her being so tiny maybe you can both just enjoy her together.

On the morning bit maybe she is getting most of her sleep then? Maybe try to get her up earlier? that way she will be ready for bed earlier?

Good luck hun, just follow your instincts and enjoy your precious baby girl!