My DH was the same with our first born. He used to stay back at work to avoid coming home, fearful that i would be in a corner in a mess with a crying baby (this never occured). He used to say he would be going to see a mate - later (months later) i found out he went up the road and read a book in his car - just to get out of the house. He was petrified, scared, felt useless, was tired, felt a bit like a third wheel....
I think its perfectly normal in a sense how your DH is reacting.....its only week 9ish.....
Could you involve him with little tasks that involve baby? i.e rather than giving him the task of bathing baby, ask him to get the bath water ready, towels, lotions, clothes.....do it gradually rather than throwing him the task all at once.

We've just had bubs #3 and my DH still has not changed her nappy, nor bathed her. I think he feels shes so small, and feels a bit intimidated by her size. KWIM? Hes a great, perfect, unreal dad overall, but not too good with the newborn stuff......
Dont worry.....a relationship will develop.....maybe not as fast as you had hoped, but there will be that special dad and son relationship....just give it time.