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thread: how long does your toddler take to wind down and what do you do...

  1. #1
    BellyBelly Life Subscriber

    Feb 2006
    melbourne
    11,462

    how long does your toddler take to wind down and what do you do...

    so DD (almost 2) seems to need some wind down time when in bed before falling asleep, that would be fine if she didnt need me there with her, so im wondering if say reading books with her inbed for around the length of time she fluffs around would help her wind down and fall asleep quicker.
    so how long does your LO take and what dod you do?

  2. #2
    Registered User

    Sep 2008
    In a cloud of madness.
    4,053

    We read lots of books and sometimes i'll put on kids shows for her to watch. Moreso books though and no tv or sit and listen to music and talk about the day and what we are going to do tomorrow. HOWEVER... this isn't working for us now as it's taking her at least 3 hours from the time i put her to bed until she goes to sleep (and thats a min!)
    I usually read books out of bed.
    Will be interested to hear what others have to say. Hope you can find something soon hun. xx

  3. #3
    Registered User

    May 2007
    3,220

    E has a cup of milk, zipped in to her sleeping bag, then we read a book together. Then we go through the whole routine, of kissing the picture of J, saying goodnight to the butterflies on her wall, and the faries on her wall. Then she says goodnight to about 5 different teddies. All up taking about 15 mins.

  4. #4
    BellyBelly Life Subscriber

    Jan 2006
    11,633

    DS takes aaages to wind down. Thankfully since he was about 2 or so he didn't need us ther the whole time. He has bath, supper and books, then lights out and songs. Then he blathers on to himself (sometimes needing us to pop in and out) for 30-60 minutes after all that.
    Sometims I've found reading more and more books works. We insist he's quiet and still for books and songs, which helps him to wind down a bit. If he is noisy or moves aroudn he gets one warning then we walk out.

  5. #5
    Registered User

    Oct 2008
    Victoria
    4,601

    Usually he winds down pretty fast. After about 4 books of his choosing, zip into bag, kiss for Mummy & Daddy, goodnight pat for the cats I can hear him rolling around for about 5 mins.

    Though sometimes for whatever reason it's not working for him and he'll go for an hour or more! But we'll go in and pat him off to sleep for as long as it takes in this case.

  6. #6
    Registered User

    Mar 2009
    1,400

    OMG - thank goodness it is not just us. DD2 here has been up for hours recently...we have been doing dinner at 5.30. Bath. Quiet time until 7.30, usually reading books and quiet playing. We read a book together, teeth, pretend to go to the toilet (her that is), then bed. Last night was a bit later but she was still going strong at 10.30.... something is going on as she is usually really good. We have had to lie on the floor until she goes to sleep otherwise she shrieks the house down. I have organised playdates etc in the afternoons for this week in desperation but not sure it will make any difference as the girls are quite full on anyway.
    Really interested in others experiences....

  7. #7
    Registered User

    Jul 2008
    Melbourne
    3,244

    DS is either fully on or stopped completely so we don't have the best wind down - now that he's up a bit later, we eat dinner together then he plays for anything up to 30 mins, then he has a bath. after his bath he usually runs around naked for a bit & then it's into pj's & pretty quickly into his sleeping bag. sometimes we read a couple of books & sometimes it's straight to lights out, a feed & bed.

    we've tried doing quiet time after his bath but he pretty much runs around like a loon no matter what we do, so we just go along with it.

    he takes anything from a couple of minutes to 40 to go to sleep - anything over that & it's usually because we've gone too early with bedtime but someone is with him till he goes to sleep.

  8. #8
    Registered User

    Apr 2008
    4,427

    We have had a few bad nights lately but most nights no problem. Our wind down time has started to involve 'baby'. DD got her first baby doll for Christmas. When it is time for DD to go to bed, DD and baby sit down together with me in DD's room and we pick 4 stories (sometimes there is a little bit of a misunderstanding on how many stories but nevertheless, there are stories.

    Then I say something to DD along the lines of, its getting late now, mummy is so tired, is baby tired (she always nods or says yes) and I say well lets go to bed. Together we wrap baby up and then put her in DD's bed and DD climbs in next to her lying down and pats babies back. I turn some very gentle lullaby music and DD has a projector thing on her ceiling of the moon and some stars and give them both(yes the baby as well) a kiss and we say love you and goodnight. This has worked a treat the last2 nights as DD is all of a sudden loving caring for babies. Tonight I walked out and she was patting her wrapped up babies back and I did not hear a peep all night. She probably tired herself out patting her baby (I know it tires me out when I have to pat her)

    Anyway who knows how long it will work for but its a nice wind down and very quiet (for babies sake )

  9. #9
    Registered User
    Add Sterla on Facebook

    Jun 2008
    Tasmania
    3,011

    We have our bedtime routine - tea, bath/shower, dressed for bed... then we read books for about half an hour (depending on how tired DS seems), then he goes to bed. He might talk/move around for 5-10 minutes, but will then drift off on his own.

    I think reading books is a big part of why he goes to bed so well - it's a quiet activity, and he sits on my knee so he gets lots of nice close contact before bed for the night. Also, because it's part of the routine, I've noticed he actually starts getting noticeably sleepier after a few books.

    Definitely worth a try .

  10. #10
    BellyBelly Life Subscriber

    Feb 2006
    melbourne
    11,462

    thanks everyone!
    our routine thats been the same since she was 3 weeks old is currently
    5.30 dinner
    6.00 bath
    then book boob and bed...
    though im weaning off the boob and maybe thats when things took a little turn mmmmm

    am going to try the same but after boob. i'll read some books with her while DH plays with DD1 and see how we go
    am also going to try out a special CD a special person gave me


  11. #11
    Registered User
    Add Sterla on Facebook

    Jun 2008
    Tasmania
    3,011

    What time are you getting her to bed?

    DS doesn't go to bed till 8.30pm most nights because we found he just wasn't ready for bed before that. Plus, it's so light outside still at night - I think he was having trouble getting to sleep earlier.

  12. #12
    2014 BellyBelly RAK Recipient.

    Mar 2008
    Vic
    4,806

    We have a bedtime wind-down that took us so long to get, but I just love it. After dinner, she has a play. 7.30 she's in the bath, splash around for half an hour or so. Then it's a cup of warm milk, and into bed. Three stories and it's lights out. She knows this and lies down herself (after sitting down while stories are being read). Then I sing in a whisper "Hoot's lullaby" and firmly tell her "Goodnight, I love you, it's time to go to sleep." She always tosses around a bit to get comfy (don't we all?!) but always now between 5 and 15 minutes later, she's asleep.

    The BEST advice that I got on here, and it worked for us, was to not break the routine you want her to be in for two solid weeks. Before we did that, she'd go to bed between 11-11.30 each night. She'd get past it and just keep playing. By enforcing her bedtime, and doing the same thing every night, even if we have people over, it works. We've even found that if we're out, by 9pm, she's saying "tired" and "sleep". GL.

  13. #13
    BellyBelly Life Subscriber

    Feb 2006
    melbourne
    11,462

    sterla she goes to bed at 6.30 usually asleepby around 7.10 but thats after alot of stuffing around.
    have thought about her going to bed later and after DD1, but im worried thats going to cause issues with DD1

  14. #14
    Registered User

    Dec 2006
    Melbourne
    3,737

    We have dinner, let the girls play for 10min then it's a bath we let them do nudie runs and go a but crazy before they hop in then after the bath we get them in their pj's, brush their hair and read them both a book while they have some milk. Then it's lights out and we shut their doors. The both have a torch in their room and we let them play in bed with it and some toys. Eventually they settle and fall asleep. Dd2 is normally asleep in about 15 minutes.

  15. #15
    Registered User

    Dec 2006
    Melbourne
    3,737

    Forgot to say bedtime is 7.30 for both girls.

  16. #16
    BellyBelly Life Subscriber. Love a friend xxx

    Sep 2008
    Melbourne
    1,424

    We have a nice little bit in our routine which is working really well for DD in terms of laying still and unwinding...

    We snuggle up together and do a bit of a debrief of our day. This essentially means that I give a blow-by-blow description of everything we did from the moment we got up - what she had for breakfast, where we went, who we saw... I throw in my own commentary on things to reinforce behaviours or experiences I want to highlight or that build self-esteem ("you were very helpful/brave/clever when you..." or "you ate lots of yummy broccoli at dinner"). I only focus on the positive things that happen, unless I think I can help to resolve an issue that she's still stuck with. DD really loves this and hangs on every word! It's like the story of her, and it's all recent enough that she can re-live it and smile at the bits she enjoyed. I just try and keep a very quiet, soft voice too so she has to really settle down and be quiet herself to be able to hear me. Finally, I talk about what is going to happen now (I hope) "now we're going to put your music on, you're going to lie down, give Pinky (toy) a big cuddle and tell her all about your lovely day, then you'll close your eyes and go to sleep".

    I can't say it's 'magic' - we still have probably 3 in 7 nights when she's up bouncing around for an hour or more, but if we've timed bed time right and she's had bath, books, milk and then "Ivy's day" story... mostly she chats to Pinky for 5 -10 mins or so and then she's out.

    GL - hope you find what works for your gorgeous girl!

  17. #17
    BellyBelly Life Subscriber

    Feb 2006
    melbourne
    11,462

    thanks BR and Santosha!!

    i tried the books in bed and taking her baby to bed etc... it still took as long to go to sleep but hoping it will improve, though the huge success for the night was that for the first time since shes been born i put her to bed without boobie if im home to do bedtime i have to feed her, she'll go down for others ok but if im there it has to be boob, so success #1 was weaning off the pre bed feed!

  18. #18
    Registered User

    Dec 2007
    Melbourne
    294

    Sorry if this has already been mentioned, but is she still having a day sleep? If so it might be worth cutting back on the length of it a bit. DS is about the same age and he is up until 10ish if he has too long a sleep (or a sleep at all) during the day.

    Our routine is similar to many of those above - dinner at 6.30, then bath, then read a story, then sing a song, then bed. I do make sure he's not wound up by DH after he gets home, and talk about being sleepy etc LOL

    I also have a trick where put him in bed and I sing/rock a doll to "sleep" and then give him the doll to cuddle and say "shhhh baby is sleeping". Keeps him quiet some nights long enough to fall asleep. I'm sure he'll wise up to this soon haha.

    Just a thought - we've swapped to Dr Suess books lately - the rhythm of the writing seems to settle him down more than a general book.

    Good luck!

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