We only ever got paid sitters in when we HAD to... maybe every 6 months... NEVER for us to just go out as a couple... it was always for a function like a wedding. Our family have never really been available or close enough (my family live interstate and DH's are mainly in the country). Now that our eldest is 15 we occassionally get her to sit... but only every few months. We have used our neighbours teenage kids too... they don't ask for much... one insisted she do it for free but we gave her $40 for the night.

I agree, it's so hard... all the parents we we know seem to have grandparents to help... and use them at least once a week. We have gone over a year without having any kind of sitter.... and yes, we had no social life.