"I'll never ever..."

[OceanPrincess]

I read an article in an issue of Essence recently and it got me thinking about how it applied to me...

The article was about how readers' attitudes to parenting had changed since having kids. Was there something they had said they would never do, only to eat their words once baby was born? (Course they said it much more eloquently than that... )

Got me thinking about how my own attitudes to parenting had changed... and how have yours?

For me it would be:
- I used to look down my nose at parents who put those backpack and leash combos on their children... "Can't you control your own child? How horrid that you have to use a leash..." And now, my monkey backpack and leash gets a run almost every time we go to the shops... it is the only way I can be sure my DD will stay within arm's reach! Otherwise she'd just run away - she's fearless!

- I said I'd never co-sleep, for a variety of reasons... and now, with a winter baby as well as a toddler to deal with, I find it so much easier/warmer/more relaxing to feed him in bed and doze back off to sleep, before I know it he's been there almost all night!

So what have you had to adjust? Rethink?

[sasha]

Ha, so many things! Discipline: First I thought I'd smack, rather than use time-outs (how pointless are time outs? How can they possibly work? That kind of thing). Then once S was born I realised I couldn't smack him, and then thought I'd never smack him (and I have, twice - both times when he bit me and I slapped him without thinking.... and felt AWFUL afterwards). And I we use time-outs a lot and they are very effective!

I was happy about the idea of them sleeping in bed with us if they were scared or feeling unwell, turns out neither of them likes it and would prefer to sleep on the couch!

I thought I would use sign with them and then found I just couldn't be bothered and we did fine.

I thought I'd NEVER EVER leave my children in the car unattended, EVER, and I have, when I've had to fill up with fuel and I know that getting them out and taking them in is just going to be so, so hard, that I just lock them in and go and pay. (Mind you, I'm constantly checking out the window to see that the car is still there and I'm terrified something will happen, so I'm not sure if the stress of having them with me is more or less than worrying about them in the car on their own!!)

There are so many other things, but S is going to bed and we're trying to get him to sleep in his bed rather than on the loungeroom floor... something else I never thought would happen!

[Miss E]

Oh goodness, there are so many things!

First one that comes to mind was that I thought I wouldn't let my child watch TV till they were two... That went out the window a few months ago, and I'm almost ashamed to say that sometimes I let him eat dinner with it on

I'm sure there are many, many more... When I think of them I'll pop back...

[Miss.September]

Co-sleeping was it for me. I swore I would never ever do it. DD got to 7 months old before it happened. We went away with family and she freaked being in a strange place. I didn't want her to wake up her 18mo cousin, so I pulled her into bed with me to settle her. She's almost 17 months old now and still ending up in my bed

But it is nice though!

[ss_storm]

I used to roll my eyes (secretly) at parents with tantruming kids at the shops...now I really do feel for them (although not the ones swearing and saying awful things to their kids!) since DD chucked a major tantrum at Officeworks the other day and I raced out of there as fast as I could

[meow]

I wasn't going to let my child watch TV before 1 and very little, if any, before 2... yeah right.

[Just Me]

I thought I would never ever have DH bath the kids, make dinner, do the dishes, clean the house or fold washing after working all day if I was a SAHM. I thought that if I was at home all day that they should be my roles since I wasn't working. How clueless was I about how hard it is to be a SAHM!

I never ever thought I would co-sleep or babywear.

I never ever thought I would love my kids as much as I do or enjoy being a mum this much.

[sasha]

I never ever thought I would love my kids as much as I do or enjoy being a mum this much.

Amen to that!

[Kazmar]

I read an article in an issue of Essence recently and it got me thinking about how it applied to me...

The article was about how readers' attitudes to parenting had changed since having kids. Was there something they had said they would never do, only to eat their words once baby was born? (Course they said it much more eloquently than that... )

Got me thinking about how my own attitudes to parenting had changed... and how have yours?

For me it would be:
- I used to look down my nose at parents who put those backpack and leash combos on their children... "Can't you control your own child? How horrid that you have to use a leash..." And now, my monkey backpack and leash gets a run almost every time we go to the shops... it is the only way I can be sure my DD will stay within arm's reach! Otherwise she'd just run away - she's fearless!

- I said I'd never co-sleep, for a variety of reasons... and now, with a winter baby as well as a toddler to deal with, I find it so much easier/warmer/more relaxing to feed him in bed and doze back off to sleep, before I know it he's been there almost all night!

So what have you had to adjust? Rethink?

I still HATE those leash's sorry

Im just amazed how little I knew about anything eg: breast feeding! Also I thought EVERY birth would end in being 'cut', thanks to all those morons that passed on their own bs opinions onto me, which then molded my tiny, young brain hahaha

I crack up when I hear my sister with somethings. "Why do people stress about there babies breathing etc, its no different to having your partner go to sleep"

[Swoop]

I never thought I'd be a SAHM past initial maternity leave, I always thought I would go back to work full time. Here I am, having been originally due back this week, and very happily at home with my DD.

I never thought I'd be so 'into' gentle parenting. The amount of times when DH and I have disagreed on some parenting thing or another and I've just had to say yep, i've changed my view since having her.

[deletedit]

I thought I would go to uni, get a job, work a decade or so in some nice government research position, get a PhD, get married, have kids.

I ended up a single mum at 25, went back to work part time, then quit, now a self-employed unmarried (defacto) SAHM in the country.

Never really had much to do with kids but my own are fine, even if DD#1 drives me bonkers at times the whole chain of events triggered by having her (very long story and not pleasant so I won't share) led me to meet my current partner, who I would never have met otherwise. I just missed him at uni - I was teaching there and he started uni the year I finished so I never had him in any of my classes. Would have been a bit weird dating one of my students though ...

[boomba]

Great thread!
I said I would never let my kids eat all over the house....now as long as they eat something I dont mind where they eat it!
I would never be the banshee lady yelling at her kids to come back cause my kids would be well behaved when we went to the shops.....yeah right! Banshee is my middle name!
Defintiely not using TV as a baby sitter....DS1 has dinner in front of the TV cause its the only way he will eat shamefull I know!
Would never ever let the kids have junk food...DS1 is a chocaholic

[Renee_AW]

I didn't think I would co-sleep until I read about the benefits for DS. He sleeps in his bassinet in our room but at 14 weeks is getting too big for the bassinet so will soon be moving into his cot in his own room (I don't sleep when his is in bed with us).

I don't want him to go into his own room but his cot doesn't fit in our room & our bed doesn't fit in his room!

[ladybirdflies]

some very funny replies here!!!
I thought I would NEVER let my children eat in the car! Squished sultana's are a plenty in our backseat! YUK, but I still hand them food when we are traveling!

[AwesomeFoursome]

I would never put my children in childcare. DS starts Friday.

I would never put them on formula. DD was on it from 7 months.

I would never yell at my children. Yeah that worked NOT.

[melsa31]

I thought I'd never let my child use dummies. DS started using them at 3 weeks old

[nic]

I was never ever going to give my child a lolly while shopping or open something up before going through the check-out

[~Kaz~]

hahaha! I thought I'd never use a dummy too and DS has had one since he was 3 days old

Agree about thinking I wouldn't use TV. Some days he doesn't watch it but others it's on for half an hour or more.

I used to think there's no way I'd survive without enough sleep. I never had a cut off date in my head but just held a firm belief that I'd really struggle with long term sleep deprivation. Well, it's been nearly 18 months (more if you count the last tri) and I'm still coping (just) and I try really hard not to let it affect my parenting.