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Thread: I'm so sick of doing this every day NEED HELP!.. video attached

  1. #37

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    my little man started getting all funny when he started to cut out one of his naps. What I found worked for him was giving him something to watch - like the leaves outside - he'd just zone out watching them. So a lot of his day sleeps he spent strapped into his rocker thing facing a tree. I'd start of rocking it with my foot and he'd just zone out. He'd have his blankie and a cuddle blankie (a blanket toy with a head on it, from big w) and when he was ready to sleep, he'd actually put that over his face to block out the light, that's when I'd close the blinds.

    Also, you've mentioned its on the west side of the house and you're renting, is it possible to put something outside the house (an umbrella? tarp?) which will block the light & heat coming in?



    Good luck, its bringing back all kinds of memories of Pip as a bub.

  2. #38

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    I haven't read all of the replies but to me he looks very tired and wants to sleep, but it's as though he's fighting the blanket he's wrapped in and wants to sleep on his side or tummy but can't quite get there because the wrap stops him moving freely. Maybe you could put him in a sleep suit (cant think of the name of them but are like a sleeping bag with no sleeves) so he's able to move freely and see if that makes a difference.

    Just wanted to add that some babies don't sleep instantly when you put htem into bed, maybe he just needs time to doze off. As long as he's not screaming hte house down maybe you should just leave him to fall asleep by himself and see if that works.

  3. #39

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    I was going to say the same as Lulu.

    Either try no wrap, or if that distracts him too much being able to roll about (I agree it tends to be impulsive for them.. same when they learn to crawl or sit) make it a real firm wrap, and tuck a sheet over him nice and firm too to hold him there. This helped with DD.

    And I should know - I'm a serial wrapper LOL I wrapped DS until 7 months, and DD was wrapped until 15 mths! At these ages they weren't wrapped all night tho, they were just wrapped for that initial night sleep, then after night feeds were left unwrapped.

  4. #40

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    I wrapped my DS in a SwaddleMe by Kiddopotamus wrap, there was no escaping from these things! The velcro tabs kept him in tight...Cai, is that what you are talking about? They are about $35.

    I wrapped my DS til 6 months. We gently weaned him off the wrapping into a grobag.

    Good luck hun.

  5. #41

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    I couldn't get teh volume to work so I haven't got the full flavour but this is what I would do.

    He doesn't looked very relaxed. I'd work out what WILL make him relaxed - personally I would half-wrap him then I'd sit on the rocking chair next to the cot and rock him for a up to a few minutes and say nice soothing things to him, like "what a nice morning we 've had, sleepy time now, oh, it's time for a nice sleep." I think hearing soothing things is very important to babies.

    Then when he looks relaxed and his eyes are starting to close, I'd get up and continue rocking a bit then transfer to cot and carry on saying "sleepy time now".

    If he's quietish, I'd then leave and ONLY go back if he's crying (rather than having a bit of a grizzle).

    I think the key is to get them relaxed but let them go that last mile to putting themselves to sleep on their own. But you have to be persistent - it took four days of doing that at EVERY sleep for my DD to get it - doesn't sound long but that's about 30 sleeps in total because she was only a couple of months old.

  6. #42

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    so many people have replied to this and im sure you have so many different views and stories but i wanted to send my hugs to you!!! i went through a (short) time when DD wouldnt settle and for that week it was SO hard and i can (kinda) sympathise with how stressfull and hard on you it is....especially with another child to deal with!!! hope the MCHN has helped you and given you some good advice.
    Il just say what works for us...
    DD decided she wanted to stop being wrapped at about 5 months, so i got a light sleeping bag, took her a few days to get used to it but loves it now. for day sleeps i have to get the room as dark as possible other wise she wakes up as soon as i try to put her down. I feed her untill she is fast asleep, i have learnt over the last few months to tell when she is REALLY asleep...if i get it wrong i have to start all over. Then i very carfully take her off the boob and bring her up so she is on my shoulder, i bounce her for a few mins to make sure she is properly asleep still, when i feel her arms go floppy i know she is asleep again. then i gently put her down in the cot, sometime she doesnt even stir and i sneak away and she sleeps for an hour or more. sometime she stirs a little, i stay lent over her so she can see me when she opens her eyes and drifts back off, sometimes she stirs a bit more, i either keep my hand on her arm or tummy or back, depends how she is laying (she sleeps on her tummy 99% of the time) and that normally does it, sometimes she rolls over and tries to play, i pat her gently on the back and she normally drifts back off.....OR she looks at me smiles from ear to ear and flaps her arms and legs about....in which case we get up and play for another 1/2 hour and try again!!!
    That sounds like SUCH a DRAMA i know and im sure it could be easier but that is just what works for us. its taken a while but she now sleeps pretty well in the day. SHe has only put her self to sleep at night and only a few times when she was abit younger! now its all to exciting and she would just end up screaming.
    hope you find what ever method or technique that works for you....how ever long winded or crazy sounding it turns out to be. and hope you soon have an easy routine and a happier day!! hugs.

  7. #43

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    wow big thanks and to everyone! I'm so greatful for the advice and all the suggestions..i will be putting them to good use and trying out a few things to see what works for Ds. It's so good to hear a variety of suggestions..a lot of things i hadn't even considered and now i feel a bit more confident armed with information...thanks Kazbah- it didn't even occure to me that he might be dropping a sleep and now that i think of it i think that could possibly be part of the problem...somebody else suggested teething (so sorry can't remember who) so i had a look in ds mouth and low and behold i think i can see teeth! They haven't errupted yet but i can definitely see the outline ot the tooth through the gum if that makes sense...silly me, i just assumed that because ds's big brother teethed at 8months that we had a while to go yet but i guess every kids is different right?

    Thanks to everyone who suggested growbags/sleeping bags and think they're a great idea..unfortunately i couldn't find any where i live...can you believe it i went the big w, target and woolies and the only thing i could find was a big heavy winter sleeping bag in a size 2! I would've thought they'd have them since they're pretty popular..oh well i'll have a look on ebay.

    I've noticed that if i keep Ds awake for as long as i possibly can..i mean to the point where he's really cranky and tired then he goes down fairly well...its strange because most people say to put them into bed as soon as you see tired signs but Tobias seems to be the opposite..haha trust me to have a backwards bub!
    I saw the MCHN today and she was pretty much no help at all... i told her everything i've tried and she just sort of glossed over the topic and didn't offer any real advice grrrr oh well thankfully it looks like we've sold the house so we'll be in a new town in 6weeks and i can hopefully find a more helpful MCHN.
    Anywho i just wanted to say thank you thank you thank you!
    You're all such lovely people and have helped me out so much, i don't know where i'd be without the support BB provides
    I'm sure i'll be back with another post when it all gets to much again but for the moment i have lots of suggestions to keep me busy!


  8. #44

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    Celeste my DS is the same... He goes straight to sleep if he's really tired. He doesn't get over tied and difficult to settle.

    Just another thought (not sure if someone mentioned this), are you trying to get too much sleep out of him? Maybe he's just not tired. DS use to be awake for 1.5 to 2hrs & was difficult to settle. Now, he sleeps 45mins in the morning, 2hrs at lunch & sometimes 30mins in the afternoon (he is only 5mths corrected age), then he goes to bed at 6pm & wakes around 5 or 6am. I found he was getting very hard to put to bed until I realised he was getting older & needed more awake time & less sleep.

    Best place to get the sleeping bags are online. There's heaps to choose from. Here's a couple I looked at when looking at buying one

    Baby Bedding - Baby Clothing and Nursery Essentials | Baby Clothes and accessories, Bassinet and Cot Linen and More at 9monthswaiting.com.au

    Bambini Pronto : Products

    I ended up going to a local baby shop & picked up a gro bag for $55.

    Please keep us updated on how you're coming along.
    Last edited by Georgi; March 17th, 2009 at 06:32 AM.

  9. #45

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    will he sleep on his tummy? This is the only way Ashton would sleep!

  10. #46

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    lestyrox - My DS also is a backwards bub and wouldn't sleep unless he was knackered! We would notice when he started rubbing his eyes & stuff (the time 'normal' babies are ready for sleep) - and we'd take him to our bed and play full-on for up to half an hour. Then get a bottle and he'd drop right off.

    I couldn't see the vid because it's been deleted, but I would think too that you know the fight you're in for so you're tense... he'd sense that and be restless because of it. Vicious circle, I know! But perhaps put on some music that relaxes YOU so that it helps him relax too? Hope you get what I mean!

    Good luck!

  11. #47

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    Sleeping issues I had the sleeper from hell but I'll get to that. I can't see the video but based on what the other ladier have said I'll chuck my 2c in

    Can you pinpoint the time just before his tired signs? often by the time bub gets to those ones they are already overtired. Could you try a timed routine like wake up at... nap time at... Never worked for us but I never really tried I'm not a routine person. I have heard they work wonders for some people.

    try some other sleeping signals, is it possible to pop a movie on for your 2 yr old or for them to lie down with you? My son was a lot older so it was a little easier.

    If the wrapping isn't working as he is fighting it you can try wrapping from under the arms so he still feels snug but has his arms out. Try massaging his arms if they are flailing around while trying to sleep.

    Now my DD, after nearly 15mth of no sleep, no sleep school success (we didn't to the live in just the classes) and a dr suggesting we sedate her - YES It turns out DD had some severe food intolerances to salicylates - found in most coloured vegetables, skin of fruits, herbs, spices, natural food colours and ... teething relief creams and asprin. After 1 week on an elimination diet she started sleeping for 2hrs per nap and 7 hours straight at night followed by antoher huge chunk of night sleep. PM me if you want details but maybe look into food or dairy reactions causing problems

  12. #48

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    Hi Georgi, missymoo84, Nettie and Saram thanks for your replies
    I've deleted the video from myspace because i was a little worried about anyone having access to it....i'm probably just being paranoid but i feel a bit funny putting my little guy on the big bad web lol
    In the video he pretty much rolls onto his tummy/side over and over again while i'm trying to settle him (he's wrapped with his arms in) and constantly knocks out the dummy..

    Yesterday was absolute hell. He fought his sleeps all day..each nap (he has 3per day) was a struggle and it took around 2 hours to settle him each time. I'd wait till he was absoluety tired (well at least i thought he was..) and then i'd wrap him, feed him and when his little eyes were just closing i'd pop the dummy in and put him into bed..well as soon as i put him down surprise surprise he was wide awake again! So i'd get him up but then he'd just grizzly and winge as if he's tired sooo I'd do the hole thing again..and again.. it took 4 attemps each nap! By the end of the day i was exhausted and so teary. Luckily DH had the day off work so he could help out..i think it was an eye opener for him to see excatly what its like everyday.
    The thing is i just have no idea what to do with him, i feel like i can't read my own son's signs. I could swear he's tired and ready for bed but then he just wont sleep.
    i've tried;
    • not wrapping him....no luck he just keeps pulling the dummy out
    • Wrapping and no dummy....just scream untill i put the dummy in and then fights the wrap
      • putting a mobile above his bed for him to look at and try to distract him from rolling...no good, seems to over stimulate him..had the same problem with his big brother.
    • no dummy and no wrap...screaming, screaming and more screaming
    • holding/rocking him to try and get him to sleep...thinks its play time, seems to wake him up more and doesn't help with his brother making noise
    • no wrap, and putting an extra dummy in his hands so he wont pull the one in his mouth out..no luck just drops the one in his hands and goes for the one in his mouth
    • He has gentle music going in his room (has since birth) doesn't seem to help
    putting him down at the FIRST tired signs....no luck, he ends ups playing/whinging and screaming in his cot

    He slept in a sleeping bag (found an old one of DS1's) last night.. its one of those ones that has the flaps over the sleeves so i can keep his hands inclosed....it seemed to work, he didn't pull the dummy out but he woke 4 times for a feed (every 2-3hrs )... not sure if this has anything to do with the non settling, he's been feeding every 2-3hours round the clock for about 6+ weeks.. its horrible because he's so fussy during the day and then night times are hell too..i'm just not getting a break The MCHN suggested solids so he's having 2 teaspoons full of rice cereal 2 times a day, he seems to like it and opens his mouth for the food, he has no tounge thrust reflex left so its going down well......please no judgements, it was a hard decision to make and i've always believed that breast is best until 6months but i'm desperate and we have noticed a tiny improvement there.

    Anyway this morning i put him on his tummy to sleep and after about 1/2hour of whinging/crying ( i didn't leave him to cry, was patting and stroking his back) and he finally went to sleep...he slept for 1 1/2 hours which was great... i'm going to try and see if that works for his next sleep

    I thought maybe he's cutting a sleep out because he's staying awake for up to 3-4hours at a time (too long i know but he just wont go down) but i really have no idea

    Anywho he's sitting in his rocker next to me and whinging...he's been up for 2 hours now so i might see if i can get him down...i'm trying to get his brother to have a sleep too so i can grab a quick nap....not holding my breath though.

  13. #49

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    Just an after thought....When Charlotte was being funny, I would put her on a pillow to feed. Just a normal bed pillow across my lap and feed her on that. (with your arms UNDER the pillow, so you arent actually touching bubs) So when she would drop off or nearly drop off, I would put hat pillow into the cot.
    I found it didn't disturb her as much and she didnt have to go from her head resting somewhere warm to the cold bed sheets iykwim.
    A hot water bottle in the cot used to help with transition too as it prewarmed the space, and lessened the shock. Also when you put him down, take out the arm under his head last....dont know why, but it makes a difference most of the time.

    You are doing a fabby job hun! He'll come a round...This too shall pass!

  14. #50

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    That's great that he had a great nap on his tummy today! For some reason babies seem to fight sleep, even though they really need it. It makes it sooo hard for us mums! Luckily they outgrow it eventually. Just keep at it, you WILL find something that works and when you do, it will get easier and easier over time.

    One other suggestion if you're absolutely desperate is to try a baby hammock. I used one for my DS1 who I had trouble getting to sleep in the day. He LOVED it. I could bounce him off to sleep in it and he would stay happily asleep for much longer in it too. You can hire them if you wanted to try one out.

    Keep going, you're doing great .

  15. #51

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    Sorry to hear you had a bad day yesterday. Gees, it's not fun is it. Big hugs to you.

    His tummy nap sounds good. I am wondering how you got on today.

    I really hope you find something that really works, really soon.

  16. #52

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    well today was marginally better... it took around 1/2hour each nap to get DS down which is heaps better than usual..still waking up 3+ times in the night...i put the dummy in once last night because i was too tired to feed him and he'd only had a feed 2 hours earlier so i figured he wasn't hungry and guess what..he went back to sleep for 1 1/2 hours so maybe i just have to be strong and not keep feeding him so much?? its just easy to feed him when he wakes because i know he'll go straight back to sleep but i'm thinking i've got him in a habit of waking all the time for a feed now

    We've gone cold turkey with the wrap..i think it was just annoying him so for the last 2 days i've been putting him in a sleeping bag or sleep suit with hand covers so he doesn't pull the dummy out...there does seem to be an improvement

    I've also made him a special taggy planky out of an old flanalette pillow case, i sewed ribbon loops and different peices of coloured and textured material around the outside...i think he likes it, i've been giving it to him to play with at each feed and putting in his cot when he goes to sleep...i'm hoping he starts to associate it with sleep.

    Awsome advice Limeslice i like the idea of the water bottle might give that one a try also transfering him to the cot on a pillow is a great idea! It seems as though the transition from my arms to the cot unsettles him so i'll definitely be using this idea thanks!

    Trish thanks for the hammock idea, i've been considering getting one..whats the age/weight limit for them? I'd hate to buy one only to have him grow out of it in a month

    Thanks for the support Georgi i hope we find something that works too! Thank God today and yesterday haven't been too bad. We're moving in 4weeks so that'll probably throw him out as well.....grrr i cant win i'm excited about the move though, right now i need something to look forward to...not looking forward to the packing though

  17. #53

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    Sounds like things are getting a little better. I have to agree with you that the feeding may keep him waking. DS just went through that. He was back to waking every 2 - 3 hours overnight. Luckily, it only took 1 night with 1 hour of crying to break the habit now he's back to sleeping through.

    Keep us updated. Sounds like you're doing a great job.

  18. #54

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    Trish thanks for the hammock idea, i've been considering getting one..whats the age/weight limit for them? I'd hate to buy one only to have him grow out of it in a month
    I used an Amby baby hammock, they are really large. DS1 slept in it until he was nearly 2! Do look into hiring one to try it out first, or you can pick them up second hand on eBay at good prices.

    Sounds like you are improving everyday!

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