My girl and her bits

[~Saram~]

Hi all just stopping by with a quick question I dare not ask on Facebook - my husband would be beside himself lol.

So Miss A is 3 going on 4 and has always had a fascination with her vagina. We have taken the road that we don't want her thinking it's wrong etc to explore her own body but it's getting a bit beyond a joke. She is quite rough with herself and at times it is red and irritated and she complains it hurts. We have been to the dr 2 times about a year apart as she complained of pain and itching but without even looking they passed it off as nappy rash. She has been out of nappies for some time now and the last dr told us to get some thrush cream to see if that helped. We have been telling her to take her hands out of her pants and to be gentle with herself. Today she came and told me she put money in her gina So we had another talk about how its a special part of your body to be cared for and respected but she is still pulling, poking etc.

The other problem I have is that after she goes a playing her hands smell, not offensive but just have an odour. We have been encouraging her to wash her hands but sometimes it feels like she just smells all the time lol.

So... please tell me she will outgrow this. Any tips for reducing the amount of time she is fiddling. Should we be doing anything more for the fact that it is often red and sore???

Thanks so much!

[helle]

Don't have any wise words sorry! However I would be encouraging her to wash her hands before she plays. Ginas are sensitive things

[Ozziehoffy]

hmmm I have no idea Sarah! Joshua was always a "player" but so far these 2 aren't so much.... Oskar will "hold it" as you see boys do but not much more (yet lol). I don't know how you make them understand some of these things sometimes. I hope though that something helps!

Lol you're right, Bob would be mortified if you put that on FB!!

[~Saram~]

lol I know - he can't stand that she enjoys going exploring so much. I tell him it's better she does now than when she's 15 lol which has him running for the chasity belt. Men are so funny about vaginas

[Ozziehoffy]

haha funny thing is I can see Bob doing that literally!!! ROFL yes they sure can be... I had a flatmate years ago (gay) who used to love saying the word cos he thought it sounded gross lol.

[Catastrophic]

DD1 is doing the same type of things, i hope they both grow out of it, or show a little restraint

[LimeSlice]

Yay for progress!! And yay for sharing, but not that much lol

[helle]

lol I know - he can't stand that she enjoys going exploring so much. I tell him it's better she does now than when she's 15 lol which has him running for the chasity belt. Men are so funny about vaginas

It's funny, huh? Yet no one batts an eye when a boy gets a bit obsessive!

[~Saram~]

It's funny, huh? Yet no one batts an eye when a boy gets a bit obsessive!

So true!!!!

[LimeSlice]

I have the same issue with Charlotte to a certain extent (She just turned 3)

Firstly, we found she was getting irritated, smelly etc. so I started adding tea tree to her baths - every night, 6-10 drops in the bath. This has solved that problem.
I also found this has helped with the odour problem on her hands too.

Secondly, I try and make sure she has knickers and pants on as much as possible, she isn't much of a stick her hands down her pants, but will go for the fanny when it is exposed (Opportunist? lol)

We have found we do need to be quite firm about it though - the stop playing with it, take your fingers away etc, I most often use the phrase "Stop playing with your fanny with dirty fingers, you will make it sick and itchy". She seems to be understanding this, whilst having me trying to preserve the 'this is your body, it isn't wrong' etc theory.

I am very very strict with her about the putting things in it. Which I struggled with (as she has seen me use tampons many times), so trying to explain to her that she shouldn't/we don't stick things in it, was difficult. But I have to be able to know she knows that nothing is to go in it at all.

So it has begun to get better, but she still plays with it more than I would like, and is roughly (pulls at it, tugging at it etc) playing with it too, but I keep reinforcing with things like "mummy doesn't do that to her fanny", "careful, or you will make it sore and itchy...".

HTH

[~Saram~]

Secondly, I try and make sure she has knickers and pants on as much as possible, she isn't much of a stick her hands down her pants, but will go for the fanny when it is exposed (Opportunist? lol)

lol - thanks Lime unfortunately Ari is much more of a go getter. Will definately try the tea tree in the bath. Will continue on the 'hands out of your pants' track and hope she gets over it and yes hoping she got the message tonight that we don't put things in it after it was quite sore tonight. lol I actually got her a mirror so she could see how 'angry and upset' it was. Try my damndest but I can't get her to get germs/sickness. She just doesn't get it. She doesn't get sick all that often so I guess doesn't really relate it to anything. I'm afraid I'll have her boardering on germaphobe with all my "wash your hands." lol

[Glamourcide]

I can't add anything to what Lime said - we're taking the same tack with DD1 (who is 3) and loooooves to play with it. She's been sticking things in it lately too, which has bugged me no end, as she just giggles when she gets caught and told off :/ I notice she usually does it when she's watching TV or just sitting around daydreaming, so I try to keep her hands occupied so they don't wander - off we go to wash our hands, here's some crayons, let's draw pictures for a while or go outside to play etc etc - and put your damn pants back on!
Hopefully she grows out of it soon, as does yours My DH *hates* that DD1 is always playing with herself, it drives him nuts, he can't stand the odour either (nor can I, I'm definitely going to try the tea-tree in the bath, Lime! Thanks for the tip!).

[angelaartsstudent]

A strip of duct tape over the area in question should solve the problem.

I am 100% totally kidding btw! (Please excuse my very dry, dark sense of humour)

I remember my sister going through this stage and I must admit, it's very handy to read the remedies BEFORE my DD starts at it becuase it's been one of my main bugbears about having a daughter! My sister NEVER stopped though...

DD has started becomming clearly curious about the area, but hasn't started trying to insert things yet.

I am at a total loss at what to suggest - I am a total tom boy and have never been remotely interested in my vagina or putting things in it LOL - but *thank you* so much for bringing up the topic, honestly!

Isn't it odd that, from working at 3 boy's schools over the years, I've seen boys of all ages constantly playing ith their bits and no one bats an eyelid but as soon as a little girl starts, it's somehow deemed taboo? Society has a lot to answer for!

[sneakysparkle]

I don't know if this will help - but we've told DD1 (who is almost 4) that she can touch hers in the bath - I explained that she doesn't want dirty hands making it sore, so in the bath is ok. But still be gentle and that nothing is to go in there! Lol

[barney]

Firstly, we found she was getting irritated, smelly etc. so I started adding tea tree to her baths - every night, 6-10 drops in the bath. This has solved that problem.
I also found this has helped with the odour problem on her hands too.

Secondly, I try and make sure she has knickers and pants on as much as possible, she isn't much of a stick her hands down her pants, but will go for the fanny when it is exposed (Opportunist? lol)

HTH

good tip hun thanks will save that for future ...and might i just say your a funny lady ,you always have such a funny way with words..thats all

and i have no advice hun i have 5 girls they have all had the odd play but nothing to bad..might just be a stage shes going through but good luck.

[misty]

check for worms - seriously they can migrate to the vagina and become a real problem for girls: and although it is very common, alot of doctors don't seem to pick upt on it! (I took my DD to the doc numerous times with the same issues, to have the suggest UTI's and perscribe ab's - it was only when looking at it closely one night I 'saw' a tiny little thread worm moving around: I had looked on other occaisions but seen nothing). Now I treat for worms first and then if still an issue go to the drs.

[~Saram~]

Thanks Misty, it has been a while so will try that. I have been worming her regularly as it did occur to me as well, esp as she often said 'but my bottoms itchy". We also tried the bath oil tonight - I wouldn't say she was pleased with the addition but she did smell squeeky clean lol

[~Saram~]

ooops I missed all those other replies.

lol at the Duct tape - I think the thought has crossed DH's mind and ditto at the boys schools - even the male teachers seem to be forever 'adjusting'. I'd like to see their faces if i started 'adjusting' various parts of my anatomy.

Tinks - yes Miss A is very sensitive to soaps so we only have bicarb in the bath and an organic/soap free wash but I might switch back to just bicarb and see if that helps.

Sneakysparkle - will see how we go with that one - it might work

Thanks again for all your suggestions. it's nice to pop in here again. You are all so very helpful!!!! especially with the stuff I daren't ask in public lol