My girl and her bits

[fi1980]

I have no advice sorry just want to give you as I imagine it must be quite frustrating and distressing for you.

A while ago I read a really interesting article about how common it is for toddlers (esp girls) to touch themselves and masturbate. I remember being a little shocked and freaked out by it and so I told DH who totally freaked and said he wouldn't be able to deal with it if our DD did that!! Then it got me thinking.... little boys touch themselves all the time. It's expected and accepted and as others have said, nobody batts an eyelid when boys do this sort of thing. So why is it considered so unacceptable for girls?? I understand this is going off the topic a little, as the issue is more that she is hurting herself, but still, it just makes me think that the problem lies more with society than our little girls

I hope you can find a solution to stop your little one from being too rough with herself and to teach her not to put things in there. It must be very frustrating but hopefully it is just a phase she is going through and the fascination will wear off soon.

Best of luck,
Fi

[Mother Goose]

My miss is bad for this. Doesn't insert anything but plays when she's tired or watching telly. She is a real Miss Priss though so I tell her young ladies don't do that and she stops.

[~Saram~]

lol really don't have a problem with her touching herself, exploring or even mastabation if she goes that far but we talk about when it's appropriate. for example, in the bath I ignore it. If she is going to sleep, I generally won't mention it if she is being gentle or just a quiet hands out of our pants (mainly cause she fell asleep one night like that lol) but we will tell her it's not something we do around others.

The bath in tea tree oil has helped a lot - she has lost that 'dirty kid smell' iykwim. We have cut out soap again as well back to just bi carb or water. Haven't got around to the worming yet but will do. It was good to hear her the other day stop herself and say don't want to make my vagina angry and she gave it a pat lol. Funnily enough she asked to have a look in the mirror again when she got out of the bath so I think that has satisfied her curiousity a lot and she doesn't feel the need to go poking around as much. I did mention to her though that we don't show anyone else our vagina. She is the type of girl who likes to share her discoveries

So thanks all!!!!

[Catastrophic]

DD1 is doing the same type of things, i hope they both grow out of it, or show a little restraint

[LimeSlice]

Yay for progress!! And yay for sharing, but not that much lol

[Ozziehoffy]

It was good to hear her the other day stop herself and say don't want to make my vagina angry and she gave it a pat lol. Funnily enough she asked to have a look in the mirror again when she got out of the bath so I think that has satisfied her curiousity a lot and she doesn't feel the need to go poking around as much. I did mention to her though that we don't show anyone else our vagina. She is the type of girl who likes to share her discoveries

Awww bless her, the little pat - too cute. Maybe she was checking it wasn't angry anymore.

Ya know, my cousin I remember was only probably 18 months or so and if my aunty was holding her (and sometimes on the floor too lol) would bounce/rub on her hip lol... was with nappy on... and I remember my mum saying something but I think my aunty at that stage just ignored it so as not to make a big deal out of something and also my cousin was quite young. It's probably just more obvious when girls do these things for 2 reasons... one, we're used to seeing guys "adjust" (even though some of them really could do it a little less obviously than they do!) and 2 it's harder for a girl to "disguise" it I guess if that makes sense?

Anyway, good progress Ari! Oh and lol on sharing... yes I get you there! Oskar was caught more than once with another little boy "comparing" and showing each other lol cos Oskar asked me how come his penis doesn't pop out the same as the other little boy... I said cos he has played with his a lot more lol... which is the truth! This kid ALWAYS has his hand on it!

[Gigi]

EVERYONE HAS A BOTTOM is an excellent storybook, which covers the issue of bodies and privacy.

I've talked to bilby about it's ok to touch herself, but in private. ANd that girl bits are very delicate, so gentle touch is needed and no sharp fingernails. I think i would be beside myself if she wanted to put things in her vagina.

bilby had a form of "nappy rash" the last few years, ever since she was toilet trained really (at 27 months old). GP told me it's to do with her not being wiped enough, after peeing. So i've had to continually "have a word" with all her childcare workers about this, as i think they assumed "oh she's tt-d, so i don't need to wipe her", which is not the case, she really needed them to wipe her, and to at LEAST check after she had had a try herself. Her ability to understand the bodily sensations of needing to go, and getting herself to the toilet - were very different from her having the motor skills to do wiping back and front.

we have been using organic bodycare products and very basic (like goat's milk) soap all her life, so didn't need to cut out harsh chemical laden bodycare products. her clothes are washed in Aware Sensitive and her skincare stuff is organic too (e.g sunscreen). i have known young girls for whom the culprit was the bubblebath (with sls in it). the acid/akaline balance of the vagina is a sensitive thang. which is why "feminine douches" are apparently such a worry. i wonder who buys those, i see them stocked on the supermarket or chemist shelf, but have never met anyone who uses them or buys them.

[CrazyLady]

The bath in tea tree oil has helped a lot - she has lost that 'dirty kid smell' iykwim.

Would lavendar oil work? Tea tree reacts with mine and DD's skin badly and DD has had nasty red bits that she was scratching today. they look all welty and such. She has had a few spots from the bath lately because of the water changing so I think it's made her itchy.

I'm glad your DD is at an understanding Saram. It's so gorgeous she didn't want to make her vagina angry.

[LimeSlice]

Yes, lavender, tea tree or eucalyptus will work - they are all anti-fungal and anti-bacterial

[bubbles81]

When do we actually have to start worming them? My dd is only nearly 2 but I had never thought of worming her - should I as a precautionary measure.?

[Gigi]

my child is four and i've never wormed her. Am i meant to?

i have never thought about worms, but i assume it's an illness, so you would only treat your child for worms, if they had worms. is that right? or should i have been worming bilby? (cos i never have).

[LimeSlice]

I wouldn't worm anyone as routine... unless you had a reason! lol

We worm Charlotte as the need arises - so far twice. We have a cat, and DD likes to share food But when we found her consistently complaining of "sticks in her bottom" and put together with mystery "my tummy hurts" 30 mins after any meal, we decided to worm her. Funnily enough, no more sore tummy, or nasty bottom sticks, since.

Is they are around lots of animals or something, then I would look it as a possibility for certain issues or complaints - just another thing to look at on your mummy list of ailments lol But otherwise, no, we don't do it as routine.

[Gigi]

we have no pets, so maybe we haven't needed to cos bilby hasn't lived with cats? is that the logic?

[LimeSlice]

Seems logical to me! She isn't at daycare either is she?

[blackduckies]

My dad had worms and no pets!!! I believe it is something you should do, they are exposed to other kids and other kids dirty hands(who when they have an itch will scratch it) on the things they touch.
Shopping trolleys, rides, playground equipement (indoor and outdoor) kids are great at putting their hands on seats where other dirty bums sit???? Just a thought, maybe I'm a bit paranoid.

[Ozziehoffy]

I wouldn't worm anyone as routine... unless you had a reason! lol

We worm Charlotte as the need arises - so far twice. We have a cat, and DD likes to share food But when we found her consistently complaining of "sticks in her bottom" and put together with mystery "my tummy hurts" 30 mins after any meal, we decided to worm her. Funnily enough, no more sore tummy, or nasty bottom sticks, since.

Is they are around lots of animals or something, then I would look it as a possibility for certain issues or complaints - just another thing to look at on your mummy list of ailments lol But otherwise, no, we don't do it as routine.

oooh so a sore tummy could be worms? Oskar says his tummy hurts sometimes and I did notice that he would tell me his bottom was itchy(so I thought worms maybe) but then like 2 seconds later he'd say no it was just his undies... do you think it could be if he's getting both? Wow... hmmm. He goes to kindy. If I do him though then I have to try to do an almost 2 year old don't I?

[~mamaspice~]

I'm so glad a found this thread. My DD is 3 and s going through a "fanny fiddling" stage too atm. It must definately be an age thing . I have been discouraging her when I see her put her hands down her pants. I also wonder if she has thrush. Will try the vinegar in the bath thing for sure.

[LimeSlice]

oooh so a sore tummy could be worms? Oskar says his tummy hurts sometimes and I did notice that he would tell me his bottom was itchy(so I thought worms maybe) but then like 2 seconds later he'd say no it was just his undies... do you think it could be if he's getting both? Wow... hmmm. He goes to kindy. If I do him though then I have to try to do an almost 2 year old don't I?

Can't hurt.
The chemist gave me chewable orange flavoured tablets, only one needed, so we did DH and DD (I have no symptoms so decided to wait a fews til after I have bubs if needed.) But right before bedtime, pants on, wash sheets and pjs in the morning, and make sure you clip and clean their nails before bathing the morning after too. (Apparently they can spread from under their nails after bottom-itching )