We only started the choices things & reward system with Matilda when she was 23 months, so close to Lily's age... maybe its something they understand as they get older? I don't know, what I do know is that I underestimated Matilda and how much she understood. She understood things long before I gave her credit for...and that took time to curb into positive behaviour as well.

I found through the safe n' sound people a strap you can attach to your car seat already & it is a harness that they can't get out of, because there is an extra strap across their chest as well... it is what we use for Matilda in the car seat & the pram. I'll PM you the details if I can find them again