Not interested in feeding self

[bridee]

My DD 21mths is refusing to feed herself. We have recently started giving her dinner at the same time as us. She has the ability to use a fork but is refusing when we eat. She will eat if we feed her.

Any tips on getting her to feed her self? We've tried on a few occassions just not feeding her and letting her go hungry but she still holds out.

[Trillian]

Is there any reason why you think that she has to be feeding herself? My eldest was more than happy to have us feed him meals until he was nearly 2. He would rarely feed himself unless it was a sandwich, which he would eat, but anything else he much preferred that we feed it to him. My next 3 all preferred to feed themselves and could do so from quite an early age. My take on it is that they will do what they want and some are happy to be fed and another like the independence of doing it themselves. If you feel that she must start to learn to do it, then don't push her to do it to the extent that she's unhappy and you're frustated as that wont solve anything and only create more issues in that she will constantly refuse your efforts. Make it fun and perhaps combine the two for a while - put a fork/spoon on the table for her, but you feed her every second time, or even all of the time, but encourage her to pick up her own cutlery at the same time and she will eventually start to feed herself.

[bridee]

My reason for trying to get her to feed herself is I thought by this age they should be doing it themselves, at least with a fork, spoon requiring food can be a bit more tricky.

[Roryrory]

My DS#1 refused to feed himself til he was about 18 months old, and then he refused to "bite" things like sandwitches - we had to break off bite-sized pieces and put them in his mounth. I have since just realised that this is a funny facet of his personality - he doesn't like to try new things until they have been proven to be fun, necessary or non-scary.

I wouldn't be too worried about her - all kids do things at different times and most kids do funny little things

[PinkPalace]

has she done it at all?
I know DD went through a stage where she wanted to be 'fed ' again although she could do it herself?

i would just encourage her and praise her like a crazy woman - sing and dance when she does