I think it is a combo of parenting style and the child's personality. But that isn't a bad thing. As you said, what else can you do if they are screaming for attention?

My DS was extremely clingy, wouldn't play by himself for more than a couple of minutes, wouldn't leave my side at mothers group etc. Then DD came along and I parented her the same but she has always been happier to play by herself/with DS, she disappears the second we get to playgroup and I have to hunt her out.

But what I have always read was that if you are there when they are being clingy (and I know it is a PITA a lot of the time), they will eventually end up being independent and confident little people secure in the knowledge that mum will be there when they need you. For us this has been true. DS made a bit of progress around 2ish and started playing away from me at mothers group, then at around 3 over a couple of months he suddenly went from a shy stand-back sort of kid to the leader in the middle of all the big kids. We have been amazed at the transformation! So just because she is clingy now, there is no reason to think that she is going to be 13 and still hanging off you.

Hang in there, you are doing a good job and she will be fine.

And pfttt to your aunt, who the hell is she to tell you how to raise kids??!!