thread: Routine or not to routine?

  1. #1
    Registered User

    Nov 2008

    Routine or not to routine?

    I haven't read any books or looked up much on the internet about this, but I am not sure if I should be trying to get her into a routine now.

    Bub is nearly 9 weeks, at the moment I am going with the flow - whatever she wants is the way that things go.

    So far her day sorta goes like this.

    11pm - 5am sleep (great I know)
    5am feed
    6am-8.30 sleep
    8.30 feed & poop
    9.30-11am sleep
    11am feed
    12pm onwards - catnap on mum/feed/unsettled for the rest of the day
    6pm cry/whine/ unsettled/ fight sleep/feed/cat nap (drive mum and dad insane)
    11pm finally sleep!

    I don't know what I am doing wrong, but my day is starting at 11am when she finally wakes up then I can't get anything done around the house cause she won't sleep for the rest of the day! I try waking up myself at about 8.30 - but I can't cause I am so tired from the night before!

    Should I be waking her up? HELP!!!!

  2. #2
    BellyBelly Member

    Jan 2009
    hiding under my desk!

    looks like you have a routine there
    might not be one you want but it is a routine and you can see the patterns in her behaviour.
    the good/bad thing with little babies is that in a couple days it will change again.. so although it sucks that her bed time is 11pm she is sleeping (with feeds) til 830..9.5hrs is great! (if your going to bed then too)

    its absolutely normal for babies to want lots of attention and feeds in the afternoon/evening.
    I dont think you need to wake her up. she will change soon and it may make things worse(could make it better) but just take turns in the evening.. tag team is a great thing..
    does she have a bath at night before bed? i found that to be the BEST sleep association (plus it tires them out) nice relaxing bath or fun splashy bath either way it can get her more sleepy or burn of a bit more energy

  3. #3
    BellyBelly Member

    May 2006
    Igglepiggle Land

    Totally agree with Oorki :-)

    P.S - get whatever sleep you can, it'll help you thru that whingy phase in the afternoon / evening time ;-)

  4. #4
    Registered User

    Nov 2008

    Thanks for the tips guys, I do sleep when she sleeps, which is till about 11am! (hee hee) but I would rather have my day back. Doesn't help with any appointments.

    Oorki, we havent tried the bath at night, because well - she hates baths, much prefers showers. Also, I do all her feeds if she wakes during the night as DH's hours change every week (like this week he has to be up and out by 5am, but home by 4.30pm) When he gets home, he changes takes bub and feeds or he changes and starts dinner. We take turns with her whilst we eat dinner, then we try to get her to sleep. He usually tidies up and washes bottles for me if I haven't got round to it during the day.

  5. #5
    BellyBelly Member

    May 2006
    Igglepiggle Land

    Sounds like you and DH are doing a great job sharing the workload hun!!

    Keep up the great work.

    As for the sleep, I'm jealous you get more of a sleep in than I - but I certainly won't knock ya for it hehehe! bubs is still a newbie and no doubt will move the goal posts on you shortly - so you may get your day back before you know it!

  6. #6
    Registered User

    Nov 2008

    well pfft.. she has finally gone down at 9pm! we used a wheat bag in her bassinet to make it warm took it out and wham out like a light!

  7. #7

    Oct 2008

    Hey Krikkit,

    Sounds like you're doing a fabulous job!

    My little one has taken a while to get into any sort of "routine" (I hate that word). It all fell into place when I realised that she can't stay awake for longer than 1.5 hours (2 hours very maximum) at a time, so after she has been awake for around 1.5 hours I feed her and then put her down for a nap - usually in her pram or I go and lie down with her depending on how tired I am. Since I started doing this, she has been amazing, napping in the day and her bedtime has come forward from 11pm to 7.30pm-8pm. It was a revelation for me.
    But we were exactly where you are now at the 2 month mark.

    It does get easier and she'll find her own little groove!
    Sue x

  8. #8
    BellyBelly Life Subscriber

    Oct 2007

    Sooooo...the 11am sleep ins are the reason you didn't come for the visit at Sharons

    Seriousy though, sounds like you do have a routine going, and like the others said, it will probably change again in a minute anyway. I know with Darcie I do try and roughly put her feeds at 3 hourly, but sometimes it's more, sometimes it's less. Maybe if you want to do more while Isla is sleeping is get a sling, let her keep sleeping and you can have your hands free to do a few things.

    I did that with DS and I do it with DD as certainly makes my life much easier. I feel like I accomplish so much more.

    Darcie is feeling the cold too, so I put a sheepskin in her little bed (in my bed) and she snugs up to that.

    Sounds like you're doing a fab job, so just keep doing what you're doing

  9. #9
    BellyBelly Member

    Jan 2006

    Sounds great to me too! You are following her cues, attending to her when she needs it - what else is a mummy for?

    In my experience babies/kids like a routine where they KNOW what will happen next rather than there being a set time for anything. So for example, an older baby might know that they wake up, have a feed, play for a bit than nap before lunch. Now they might wake up at 7.30 or 0pm but the sequence in the routine, rather than the time, is the same.

    Also, you said "she hates baths, much prefers showers". Again, in my experience what a baby likes at 2 months is different to what they like at 4 or 6 or even 8 months, so don't be afraid to re-try things as she gets older.

    And I like the idea of a wheat bag to warm the bed first!!

  10. #10
    BellyBelly Life Subscriber

    Jan 2006

    Sounds like you're going well, following her patterns. It really does change so quickly, I wouldn't bother doing anything to change things right now. Give it a month or so and she'll be in a completely different pattern anyway. And a sling or carrier for the afternoon would probably be a big help.

  11. #11
    BellyBelly Member

    Jul 2008

    i agree with the PPs...i looked for patterns when DS was a newbie & just when i thought i'd found one, the cheeky monkey would change & everything would go out the window! tbh, i found things settled (well, the evening unsettled period) somewhere around 12-14 weeks & then my day became more predictable once DS started on solids at 6 months. i also think that while they're awake for such short periods & having lots of naps or catnaps during the day that it's really tough to make any definite plans etc. but the good news is that you do get your days back & once they start staying awake for longer then you can get lots more done...well, actually i should rephrase that - you have time to get out & about!

    ETA - so busy on my own little tangent that i didn't answer your question! nope, wouldn't wake her up - she will change soon enough and thinking about it, my day kinda starts at 11 - well, i'm up at 7 but by the time we do breakfast, play & morning nap - it's after 11 now & DS is alseep but will wake up soon....i don't usually plan to go out anywhere before his first nap but i think you get to the stage where you do stuff around the house when they have naps (or go on BB )

  12. #12
    BellyBelly Member

    Sep 2007

    As most pp's have said, things will change soon! Just when i thought I knew what was going on, they go and change and I have to figure it out all over again!

    I found at 9 weeks with DS, then it was prob about the hour mark that I would re-settle him, so after he's been up for an hour (inc feed and change), I would try and settle him, but tbh for the first 12-14 weeks he had pretty much all his sleeps in the sling (I have a Hug a bub and love it!) and just when i was beginning to worry that he would always need to sleep in the sling, he decided that it was time for him to go to sleep in the bassinett.

    I'd def give a sling a go for the unsettled periods, and maybe try going for a walk either with your LO in a sling or in the pram - it might help get her to have an arvo sleep. I've found that if DS doesn't have a sleep at around 4pm, then he's so unsettled for the evening and makes things extra hard.

    Just remember you're doing a great job and enjoy those sleep in's - the housework can wait

  13. #13
    BellyBelly Member

    Nov 2006
    Bendigo, Victoria, Australia

    i could go either way on this, 'cause i've just had number 2. I'm not big on routines, because wel frankly i'm not organised enough, but what you have listed sounds like what my ds did as a bub. dd is much easier but er sleep patterns are constantly changing as she goes through her milestones, and she is demand fed whic impacts as well. only 2 constants is she is always awake when i am eating a meal!!

    2 things i can suggest are watch for the tired signals. if you miss one, you will need to wait a while before you get a chance to try again and it could be anywhere from 30 -90 minutes.
    to save your sanity in the arvo's with the fed nap fed nap ds would do this too, and it drove me nuts, because he wouldn't sleep so i put him in the baby sling to increase his sleep and found I had a muh happier baby, who fed better and then slept better.

    my saving grace this time around has been the cradle i bought. in the afternoons dd is not content to be by herself no matter how tired she is, and so i wheel her out to the kitchen but her in a spot not in direct light and she falls asleep, or watches me walk around.

    some people also say sleep breads sleep