"Is she a good baby?"

[Gigi]

my memory (of having a nb) is being asked over and over "how long does she sleep at night?" - it felt such a competitive question at the time. Like, depending on the number i said, whether i'd passed a test or not.

my child slept for two hours at a time, so i always felt i failed this "test". but that's when she was hungry and needed changing. so if that's what she needed, that's what she needed.

I especially didn't like being told that if i put her on formula, that would be the magic bullet, she would sleep, i would sleep. Yeh, but she wouldn't be breastfed then. My choice was to breastfeed, i quickly found out, most people didn't approve of me breastfeeding - hang on, this is MY baby, i have made my own choice and am actually very happy with that, thank you very much.

i did feel an emotional distance from people who had bubs who slept all night, didn't feel they understood what i was going thru, why i didn't leave home to go to playgroups etc - cos i was too shattered to get to a 9am playgroup (plus i had post birth health complications from a c-section that went wrong).

[Lolli]

my memory (of having a nb) is being asked over and over "how long does she sleep at night?" - it felt such a competitive question at the time. Like, depending on the number i said, whether i'd passed a test or not.

my child slept for two hours at a time, so i always felt i failed this "test". but that's when she was hungry and needed changing. so if that's what she needed, that's what she needed.

I especially didn't like being told that if i put her on formula, that would be the magic bullet, she would sleep, i would sleep. Yeh, but she wouldn't be breastfed then. My choice was to breastfeed, i quickly found out, most people didn't approve of me breastfeeding - hang on, this is MY baby, i have made my own choice and am actually very happy with that, thank you very much.

i did feel an emotional distance from people who had bubs who slept all night, didn't feel they understood what i was going thru, why i didn't leave home to go to playgroups etc - cos i was too shattered to get to a 9am playgroup (plus i had post birth health complications from a c-section that went wrong).

I used to feel like a 'failure' too, for that very reason- if I admitted he was a 'bad' baby who didn't sleep all that much, then did that make me a 'bad' mummy? If I had a dollar for everytime I said "i'm bf'ing", only to be met with a roll of the eyes and "well, one bottle before bed would fix that problem".....

[Willow]

It's a stupid question that makes good mums feel like they're being tested and I LOATHE it when people ask me that. Like because your baby sleeps through the night that makes you a great mum? Well no, actually, it just makes your baby a good sleeper!

As a nb, DS left a lot to be desired in the sleep stakes. He was a breastfed baby and slept well at night, was always settled no crying etc so to me,that was good. Did he sleep through the night? No. Nor did I expect him to!!!

Next time I'm just going to tell people to shove it! LOL!!

[Visitor8]

I think the amount of babies that actually sleep right through is minimal ... so the sleeping thing is just stupid.

Ashton STILL wakes 3 or 4 times most nights for a feed, but I don't expect him to sleep through. Who would?

[Jennifer13]

I remember Lulu's response to this from a while back:

Well, she hasn't crashed the car or been dragged home by the cops yet, so she's okay.

Being now obsessed with correcting misinformation on how babies are 'supposed' to behave I would say: What do you mean by that?

[Pretty Butterfly]

God I hate this question!!!

Ad is getting sick of it too, and recently said " nup, she's a complete biarch, you want her?"

Would I go back 6 times if babies were "bad?"

[min]

I used to say all babies are good, but some are unhappy, mine is happy most of the time.