She's Scared to Poo - Holds it in...

[goddessofdawn]

I posted some time ago about my 2 year old constantly playing with herself - my DH figured it out.
She just started holding in her poos after a large bowel movement & this is a distraction technique. The week that she did it constantly was the week she didn't poo for 4 days. So that problem is solved...

But after doing the large poo, this seems to have scared her & now she whimpers whenever she poos and I hold her & help (not potty trained). I have started her on Osmolax as of yesterday. She pooed yesterday but not today.
I don't have any faith in GPs who will say give her fibre & water (like I'm not already doing that?!)

Has anyone been through this and come out the other side??! I have no idea how to get through this, and having googled and consequently bawled my eyes out for the last hour, no one else knows how to get through it either.

[black_rose]

We have been through this it's a hard journey. Give the osmolax a few days to work, you can also use suppositories to soften the poo, it isn't nice but works quickly if they haven't gone for a few days. Make sure you avoid bananas as they make things worse but apples, berries and pears are all good to encourage them to eat. We put chia seeds on top of cereal as they are a great source of fibre that is easy to eat. As for going to the toilet make it a happy place with a bright picture and have your dd sit and read a book as it can take about 10 minutes for them to go. We had to see a continence nurse who helped a lot but we still have regressions when she gets upset.

[Ca Plane Pour Moi]

DS had this issue when we moved house, but he had just turned 5 so I don't know if this will help. He could tell me that his tummy hurt but he didn't want to poo. So he sat on the loo and I stroked his back as we counted, as counting relaxes him. He was really upset about doing a poo but I made a big fuss of him and after a week he was sorted again.

[Amaunet]

We had issues with this (only short term) and found sitting on the toilet better than in his nappy, better position iykwim? Lots of praise and reassurance when going etc. we rewarded him as well . Good luck!

[shellbell3]

We've had similar probs but b/c my DD is 5 its easier in the fact I can go thru and try reason with her why she needs to poo. I also feel tho like I'm the poo police, making her go try to do one each night. Don't know if its helping alot but at least she's not going days now in between. She was constantly complaining of sore tummy, not so much anymore. For us there was the fear of being dirty so even tho she's 5 often I have to still clean her afterwards. The other fear was hurting so after using pear juice everyday it did help soften the poo so she learnt that it only hurt from holding in and getting hard. Good luck

[veus]

Prunes always help move the bowels in our household, if that helps.


Sorry, fat fingers syndrome might occur.

[Butterfly Dawn]

Miss 14 mths hates pooping. She whimpers and crys and pleads with her eyes.
I try give her a high fiber breakfast and pears helped when she was younger. I find its worse if she hadn't pooped for a day.
Prunes help some and kiwifruit juice is also recommend.

I'm glad you have worked out this is what her playing is about

ds1 has always hated pooping cause of the feeling. In his toddler days he even would limit his food so he wouldn't poop.
We got him a book that explained the system to him. It was his fav book. Showed the poop book to EVERYBODY that visited.

I like the happy place idea

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unless someone like you cares a whole awful lot, nothing is going to get better. its not.
Dr Seuss

[STARRYSKY]

we have had HUGE problems with this issue, DS was almost completely day TT, then he had a bad reaction to some antibiotics and stopped pooing
I tried everything natural I could think of, prunes, juice, apricots, pears etc, etc...
Giving fibre can actually make it worse.
its a tricky thing as just one hard to poo moment will trigger the fear, then they hold on again for too long and it hurts the next tie and the cycle continues.
I received some fantastic advice from here on this forum, I went to see the GP and explained what I I thought was going on, what research I had done, and how I thought best to treat it, he was amazed and just basically told me it would be fine and to go ahead. we started using parachoc, everyday, for about 3 months, until he would again go to the loo with no complaints (I have had him screaming in hysterics at doing poos, doing them in the bath, doing the "poo dance" until he couldn't hold it in anymore, its heart breaking!)
We have had a few regressions (hospital stays, operations etc... it all went down hill!)but we are now almost on the other side again.

[goddessofdawn]

Thanks all! Yes Starrysky, fibre can make it worse if they don't have a lot of liquid to go with it...
Someone told me to try Parachoc which we started yesterday - she pooed last night and again this morning
No distress this morning either

Starrysky - Do you know how long you can use Parachoc safely?? Your poor son, he sounds much much worse than my DD
We have not had hysterics, just whimpering... so she isn't too bad I guess.
This has only happened within the last 3 weeks or so, so hopefully because I have gotten on top of it quickly, it won't turn into a longterm thing, fingers crossed!

I just want to continue with Parachoc until she poos without distress consistently... because the poos are nice and soft now. I keep telling her the poos are soft and they won't hurt, and we also gave the poo a name (another recommendation) - Mr Pooey is very cheeky and I put my ear to her tummy and tell her I can hear him calling to come out (at the times when she is whimpering)...
I've also started her on a probiotic powder in her WeetBix, as well as lots of diluted pear juice to keep fluids up & aid soft movements.

The good thing about NEVER giving her junk food is that now, she gets tiny chocolate stars (new Milky Way product) as a reward and it's a huge incentive! ..... I hoped I would never have to use this method, but desperate times call for desperate measures & stickers just don't cut it.

[STARRYSKY]

We still have to encourage J to go to the toilet, DP has told him the toilet has to be fed everyday lol, "the toilets hungry!" we use the milky way stars too! and he gets a sticker on his chart, but if we didnt say anything he would still not go on his own.
I think because J was so bad, it may have damaged the nerves and stretched the bowel so now he doesnt recognise the " I need to poo" signals.
Just make sure to keep on top of it, it seemed like as soon as we thought all was good and stopped the parachoc, he would just revert bac, or something would happen and it would all have to start again.
His diet if fantastic, hardly ever gets junk (apart from the "poo stars" lol) eats so many varieties of fruit and vegetables.
I give J a yakult thing every day now too, seems to help.
Good luck with it, I think with the parachoc it can be safely used for a while but under docs supervision and like all laxatives can lead to dependence if used too much.

[Abigail]

Hi goddessofdawn, sorry that I didnt see your PM. Have replied now. Please make sure you go under medical supervision for this problem, if you stop the parachoc too early then you may find that you go backwards rather rapidly same with Osmolax etc. You can use parachoc quite safetly for up to 12 months under medical supervision, after 12 months its recommended you seek a review. The only issue with parachoc is all its lovely conditions of use which may mean that another medication may be more effective for long term use. However I hope you dont need my advice anymore and things are looking up for you.