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It's a really scary thought, isn't it?
DS is quite outgoing now and will talk to anyone too.
I think the most important thing is that we teach our kids to say no. That if they feel uncomfortable about a situation they can say no, I don't like this and refuse. Total compliance is the big danger, really.
The truth is, kids are most at risk from people they know, so it's not enough to say they must be wary of strangers.
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Very true. I suppose it is easier to think of the strange man being the one who could hurt our children, rather than thinking that "Uncle John" may be their greatest threat.
Registered User
For me i will be teaching my girls to be polite, say hello, please, thank you and to smile at people in the street but they are at NO TIME to go anywhere with someone they do not know, if they want to go to a friends house i must be asked first (friends parents are just as bad), if a 'friend' pulls over and asks to take them somewhere they will be taught no thank you mum is waiting for us (NO MATTER WHO IT IS) - if the person was to insist my kids would be taught to ask to call me first (child speaking to me not the stranger) and to let me know where they are, if someone they don't know pulls over to talk to them they will be told to say sorry but i have to go and keep walking.
They should not stop and talk to someone but to say hi and keep walking, they are not to enter someones house, say hi & keep walking.
It is all good in theory but actually teaching them i have no idea, my girls are very social already so i might have to start throwing in little 'don't go with anyone' hints.
Registered User
i think this is so important. I have known parents to 'force' kids to say hello or hug or kiss visitors in order that they not be rude, but to me it is just the first step in not allowing kids to set their own boundaries and respect the child's perception of people and right to to make guidelines for their own bodies.
Registered User
I wholeheartedly agree, and have never allowed people to push the issue with DD if she doesn't want to go to them. Grandad used to be quite put out, till he realised if he backs off and lets her come to him she'll be all over him but if he tries to pick her up or grab her in a hug she gets intimidated and backs off. But to me, it's her right to decide who she wants to be friends with, and who she wants to give hugs or kisses to - I wouldn't expect an adult member of my family to give someone they don't know a hug just because I told them to, so why should I expect that of my child?
I do think with the keeping safe strategies like not going anywhere without letting mum/dad/supervising adult know it's FAR more than hints that's needed. It's open and frank discussion, teaching the rules directly that will make sure kids know where their boundaries are.
Registered User
Yes, I agree. Teaching them to say "no" if something doesn't feel right or sit right with them. Trying to teach them about their intuition and if they feel scared then it's not right and they should say "no".
I also worry about stranger danger ALOT! I'm probably paranoid..... DD1 is 2.5 and won't always hold my hand in shops, but I usually try to get her to either sit in the pram or the trolley OR hold the pram and walk along with me. She is never out of my sight. I won't allow that. She's also a blonde hair, blue eyed little cutie and yeah, I just worry!!!! it can happen to any kid.....my DD1 is super social and will run up to anyone to say hello and talk to them!! I really have to watch her.
Someone suggested books, I think that's a great idea. Let me know if you find any!!
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