Is there anyone who does not use Santa?

[Moi]

Just Me - Thanks for sharing your advent calender events. Such a fantastic idea.

And thanks everyone for your feedback. Until I started this thread I thought I was totally alone in my thinking, but now know there are others out there who feel the same way.

[CrazyCat]

If we ever asked about santa, mum would say that she picks the presents and gives santa the money, and he buys and delivers them christmas eve. lol =P

[NaeNae]

I have not read through all the replies but I just wanted to touch on something that has stuck with me from my childhood. We grew up believing in Santa (not to mention other things) and I will NEVER forget the night my beliefs were shattered.
Mum and Dad always said "believe what you want" BUT placed emphasis on Santa/Easter Bunny etc.
It was Easter and dad woke me up accidently but leaving easter eggs in my room ... I was devasted. One because my beliefs were FALSE there was no such thing as Santa/Easter bunny etc and the WORST thing was knowing Mum and Dad LIED to us .... even though they said to believe what we wanted, they indirectly encouraged and fueled our beliefs in the make believe.
I really cannot convey how it affected us but I remember feeling so hurt and betrayed.
I know its hard but I would go all or nothing, I am not sure what we will teach our children, might need to discuss this with DH.

One Question ... how do you tell extended family what yuo are and aren't doing? I know my parents (MUM) will put extra emphasis on Santa but I just would hate for Shae to feel what I felt all those years ago.

[widdly]

Yep, I was quite old when my Mum finally told me they weren't real, I was absolutely shattered that santa was fake Christmas lost all its magic, BUT while I did believe in santa xmas was mega exciting, so I like that i believed for a while.

[tinkerbelle]

Gosh.. I myself have had this discussion with DH and he has made me feel so guilty about not wanting to bring our children up to believe in Santa.. For various reasons, partly religious, and partly other reasons, I just could not bring myself to indulge my children in this fantasy.. so at the current time, hubby and I have a very 'soured' compromise that he will teach them about Santa if he wants to, but he cannot expect me to support this belief when I feel uncomfortable about it.. so Ive told DH that if the children come to me to ask questions about Santa or want to talk about Santa, that I will be telling them to go and ask their Dad about it. and if they ask me if Santa is real, I will ask them what they think without giving them an answer either way.. - hubby is not happy at all.. !!
And gosh, it will be considered an absolute crime by my in laws when they find out I want nothing to do with Santa.. Im not looking forward to that day!!
I would also love ideas on how to compromise on this issue if anyone has any..

[tinkerbelle]

Oh and Nae Nae - I can totally relate!! Thats exactly how I felt when I found out Santa was not real - my whole reality shattered and I could not believe my parents would lie to me.. Mum still says to this day I would not have been old enough to think such thoughts.. but I can clearly remember how I felt and what I thought!

[Taurean]

Just me - I LOVE your Christmas ideas!! You are such a gorgeous, creative and fun family. Can I come and live at your house??? LOL

[~Hestia~]

This thread has been so interesting to read! My DS is only 15 months so I don't need to worry about Santa just yet, but I do feel bad about lying to him in the future. Not sure what we'll do but now I feel not so weird!

[Just Me]

Just me - I LOVE your Christmas ideas!! You are such a gorgeous, creative and fun family. Can I come and live at your house??? LOL

Ha ha - trust me, it's not fun and games all the time. We are having one of those days today But I'm flattered that you want to come and live with us




I read this blog. This post is about the Easter Bunny but same sort of idea. If you feel like a good laugh - check this out: Hyperbole and a Half: The Year the Easter Bunny Died

[Arimeh]

Just Me - I wanna come and live at your house too. As long as you have air conditioning.

We don't celebrate santa in this house either - both DH and I have a problem with the kids accepting presents from an old man, who they have never met, never will meet - so its a stranger. Like I said to DH the other night - if we get our kids to believe that santa is good and accepting presents from him is fine - whats to stop them from accepting a present from a paedophile dressed like santa who offers them something, grabs them by the arm, rips them into his car and goes off and kills them?

Yes, my mind really does think that way... comes from being a cop's daughter I think... LOL

[onthefly]

I don't know if I ever really believed in santa - it was kind of a conspiracy where nobody would speak the truth lest we miss out on presents. So there was no shattering of trust or anything - but eventually we just had to accept we were too old to pretend to believe any more.

I remember one year - I must have been 5 or 6 maybe - mum and dad must have been drinking the night before and had forgotten to put santa's gifts out. I got up at some ungodly hour to find nothing there, so tiptoed into mum and dad's room and told mum that santa hadn't been... she told me to go back to bed. Which I did, and waited while I heard them fumbling and muttering as they moved the gifts from their wardrobe (oh yeah, we knew where all the presents were too) out to the front room.

Myabe I've just always been a cynic

[Honeybee]

I remember one year - I must have been 5 or 6 maybe - mum and dad must have been drinking the night before and had forgotten to put santa's gifts out. I got up at some ungodly hour to find nothing there, so tiptoed into mum and dad's room and told mum that santa hadn't been... she told me to go back to bed. Which I did, and waited while I heard them fumbling and muttering as they moved the gifts from their wardrobe (oh yeah, we knew where all the presents were too) out to the front room.

That's hilarious Marcellus! Nice one Mum and Dad!

[lilima]

I dont see why kids can't enjoy believing in Santa. I still remember one child ruining it fir us all because her family didn't do Santa.
In saying that my DS also knows that we are celebrating Jesus' birthday.

[Just Me]

I dont see why kids can't enjoy believing in Santa. I still remember one child ruining it fir us all because her family didn't do Santa.
In saying that my DS also knows that we are celebrating Jesus' birthday.

I don't think there is anything wrong with kids enjoying believing in Santa but I also don't think there is anything wrong with not doing Santa at Christmas time either. I think each family needs to work out their own traditions that they are happy with. I think too, most of us that don't want to make Santa into a big deal have expressed a fair bit of concern about making sure that our kids don't spoil Santa for families that do want to celebrate Christmas with Santa. It's just not for everyone.

I don't think for most people in this thread it is a case of Jesus Vs Santa, I think everyone has different priorities at Christmas and for some neither of those things are important and they just see it as a time to celebrate with family.

[lilima]

I never said it was jesuszversus Santa. Just you can tell kids not to ruin it for others and kids will be kids and even not meaning to they may tell.
I think your traditions sound wonderful btw.

[Persephone1]

I agree with JM, we have many varied reasons why we don't celebrate, or don't focus on Santa. It's not a thread for judging either way. We (my family) are not religious, but we've always celebrated Xmas as a time for family, good food, fun and relaxation.

My DH and I do not intend to have Santa as part of our future celebrations because I think we can enjoy the wonder and excitement of Xmas without Santa, or religion. I don't feel comfortable having Santa in our celebrations. I hope to teach my children about respecting other people's beliefs so that they don't "spoil" it for other children. But I would also hope that other children would respect our practices as well, by not stigmatising my family for not believing in Santa or Jesus.

[Just Me]

Thanks Lilima

Sorry, I read your post the wrong way with the Jesus Vs Santa

I know that telling them not to tell other about Santa doesn't mean that they won't, but I also don't think that just because they might tell is a good enough reason to go down that path either. I think all we can do is come think about how we want to celebrate Christmas and deal with issues as they come up. I am not going out of my way to make sure that our kids know Santa isn't real, we are just not making him a big part of Christmas. I haven't told my kids about Santa - real or not. It just hasn't been an issue for us yet. When it does become an issue, I will leave it up to them to decide what they think. Santa doesn't leave presents under our tree though so I don't know what they will think of him really. I am not really anti-Santa at all and I don't think I can avoid him at Christmas and I am not trying to, I just don't want to make him a big part of it - if that makes sense

[Moi]

I dont see why kids can't enjoy believing in Santa. I still remember one child ruining it fir us all because her family didn't do Santa.

I think children can enjoy believing in Santa and I am not against Santa. I just don't think Santa is necessary for enjoying Christmas. I think children would be just as happy receiving gifts from their parents.

It is a worry of mine that my DD will spoil it for others but I don't think that's a good enough reason for me to have Santa. Though it does make me feel peer pressured to do it because everyone else does it. But again I don't think just because everyone else does something means that it is necessarily right for you. Anyway, it is a hard one but I hope I can raise my DD not to spoil it for other kids.

tinkerbelle - I am also worried about telling my ILs too that we aren't doing Santa. I don't think they will understand! But thankfully my DH agrees with me.