Thoughts on newborn and toddler with little help.

[Artechim]

Hi. I was in the same situation with no friends or family to help out when my second baby was born. In the end DH had to miss the birth to stay home and look after DS.

I would suggest getting out to mothers groups etc with your DD as much as possible just to see other people. As an alternative to a nanny/au pair, you could look at getting a cleaner in - that may be a bit cheaper and will lessen your load.

Good luck

[alioops]

My DH works away a fair bit. We live 3000km from family too. When I was due my mum came up for a few weeks to help out. I was induced, so she was able to drop my older 2 off at daycare for the majority of my labour. DD3 was born while mum was out picking them up. DH was home for the birth and was able to take a couple of weeks off, but when he went back to work I still had a nb, an almost 2 year old and a 3 year old. I just did what I could, the important things like dishes and washing were all I could manage for a little while. We also had to stop daycare during this time for financial reasons. Don't pressure yourself to be immaculate, as long as you home is hygenic the rest can wait.

[Visitor7]

Not my personal experience, but I know of a couple who organised a girl through Au Pair to help out. Once everyone had found their feet and were comfortable, she then took over as nanny when the mum went back to work at 9 months. It works really well for them as they have no family in the country and don't know many people in Cairns.

[M22]

little mr was 21 months when miss came home. Dh only home for 4 days. agreed only do what you can do, i cooked heaps before so had food in freezer only had to do pasta or salad etc.
asked peeps to bring fresh fruit bread ann dmilk instead of gift for bub- helped heaps.
i also would nap adn put them both down at the same time aroubnd 1pm they both slept for 2 hours and i slept during that time- didnt care about house etc jsut slept.

most important- i put a sign on the door saying if you haven't called.. i'm not answering hte door i have a newborn and a toddler!!

LOL

[feeb]

DS1 was 18 months when DS2 was born, DH had 2 weeks off (I was in hospital 6 days). I had CS with both and just did what I could. As long as kids were changed and fed that was the main thing. I made sure I put stuff straight in dishwasher and did regular clothes washing, I still have days now when it all piles up.