What is your 3.5 - 4 yo like?

[black_rose]

Dd1 was very similar 12 months ago, she was 3.5 yo and we were almost at the stage of looking to see if she was on the spectrum. She would scream, sit on the floor and spin and not listen and would refuse to go on the Once in front of the mchn.

What we eventually discovered that citric acid in its artificial form (301) was triggering part of the behaviour it's in everything ribena, yoghurt some cheeses, biscuits and juice etc. removing that from her diet made a big difference. Then she needed glasses and again her behavior improved. With the screaming and not talking we walked away if she was safe and asked her to use her words when she was ready to talk. In regards to the toileting we have had to go on osmolax as she was holding on and stretched her bowel it's taken 4 months and there has been a big improvement until we went away last weekend.

She is now a polite and helpful 4.5yo, so different to the screaming yelling child from last year.

I would hold off the assessment for a little while and see if she improves over time.

[Arimeh]

She doesn't do the poo thing but it sounds like a defiance thing. What happens if you ignore it?

This is our second attempt at toilet training, I gave up after 3 months of her continually pooing in her undies last year. Then a few months later (late december) I started again, and she is fine with her wees, just this friggin poo. I made a chart the other week, and got stickers and she got two stickers and a chocolate egg when she did a poo, then after 5 poos she got a present. So over the course of a week she did her 5 poos, with just a few accidents, so we took her shopping and she selected a present. Now, she doesn't care about getting more presents or stickers, she just can't be bothered I think. Its easier for her to poo in her undies. We ignored it for the first few months, but now its beyond the joke because we know she CAN do it, she's just.. well.. lazy!! Like just before, I asked her if she had done a poo and she said no, just a fart, then squatted and said she was doing a poo. So I put her on the potty - and she said she didn't want to go, and didn't need to do a poo. So I've taken her undies off now, because from past experience, in 10 minutes, she will have done a poo in them. So we will see what happens when she doesn't have the security of the undies.

so for me between them, I am going insane.

Can I drive you to the nuthouse - its good to car pool you know.

What we eventually discovered that citric acid in its artificial form (301) was triggering part of the behaviour it's in everything ribena, yoghurt some cheeses, biscuits and juice etc. removing that from her diet made a big difference. Then she needed glasses and again her behavior improved. With the screaming and not talking we walked away if she was safe and asked her to use her words when she was ready to talk. In regards to the toileting we have had to go on osmolax as she was holding on and stretched her bowel it's taken 4 months and there has been a big improvement until we went away last weekend.

She is now a polite and helpful 4.5yo, so different to the screaming yelling child from last year.

I would hold off the assessment for a little while and see if she improves over time.

Thats interesting, how did you find out that it was that particular thing setting her off? I'll talk to DH, see if he wants to call off the appointment.

[fionas]

Look, I don't know TBH.

DD1 was especially tantrumy and difficult between 2.5 and 3.5 (but for a lot of time she was housebound as I couldn't walk with SPD). She was having major meltdowns about every hour. But apart from that, I can't remember anything that you describe.

She's 4.5 so a bit older than your DD now but MOST of the bad behaviour has gone. Sure she still has her tanties but it's usually over something I understand would make a child tanty not something really silly.

It sounds like this is causing you and your family some angst and I think on that basis alone, it's worth checking out. It might be completely normal and from what others have said, it could well be. But if I had questions in my mind and it was happening a lot every day and showed no signs of abating, for the sake of $300 I'd check, even just for peace of mind. If there is something wrong, the earlier you get on to it the better. You could do nothing, post again when she's 4.5 if there's been no progress and kick yourself you hadn't done something earlier.