I did a seminar called circle of security. They encouraged you to spend time with your child (not saying you dont) try not to use no too often but try to get to the deeper meaning. They believe that a child acts out because they have a need that isn't being met. That children aren't misbehaving purely to annoy us, though it feels that way sometimes. Now its not always easy to know what the need is.

But it definately doesn't recommend CIO or smacking. It recommends being with your child through their emotions whatever they may be. That they need to learn from us how to react to how they are feeling. Hence the idea that they should be sent to their room to cry is wrong. They should be taught that It's ok to be sad, happy, angry etc. But not to lash out because of it, but to go to you to talk or have a cuddle etc. And it believes that if you do this with your child and are there for them that their behaviour will improve.

Now I can't say this works 100%, my ds likes to hit people in the face, but other than that I alwayd get comments about how he is a happy and friendly boy. I'm sure if you Google circle of security you'll find more info.

I hope this helps somewhat.

Sent from HTC wildfire using TAPATALK, so forgive any spelling errors its a small keyboard.