thread: Day sleeps. Does an 18 month still need one?

  1. #1
    Registered User

    Jan 2007

    Day sleeps. Does an 18 month still need one?

    My daughter is not having day sleeps at all. She naps in the car if we are travelling but will not sleep unless fed to sleep during the day. It is my fault that she feeds to sleep as I got lazy when she was 6 months and refused sleeps then. So turned to feeding to sleep because it meant that I got her to sleep and was able to rest then too. So of course now, I can't get her to sleep without booby feeding to sleep. Everyone else is fine, they can get her to sleep with just a bottle then into her cot. But for me...nope, nudda, nothing, zip, zero, zilch...well you get the picture.

    Then at daycare the last three times, shes refused day sleeps there as well. She has her own room and has a bunny rug from home and her bottle but will crack a tanty for up to an hour in her cot.

    I don't want to continue feeding her to sleep, I'm fine with still bf her but have to stop letting her fall asleep on me.

    So my question is does anyone else have a similar problem or any advice?


  2. #2
    Registered User

    Oct 2007
    Sunshine Coast

    Weeellll....most 18 month olds would still be having a day sleep. DS dropped his day sleeps at about 18 months. Or, to be more accurate, he would still have a day sleep but then would not go to bed till 10.30pm. So we cut out the day nap and put him to bed at 6pm and this way he actually got more hours of sleep per day.

    I was still bfing off to sleep at this point though. But because he was so tired by then he could fall asleep at 6pm without needing the breast.

    I have no real advice to offer other than to reassure you that someone else has been in this situation! I would see how this pans out over the next couple of weeks. She may need a catchup nap every few days and if she is tired enough will still go with the bottle. It may be a phase out of the nap rather than all of a sudden just dropping it, KWIM.

    We had to take it day to day with DS for a while, every few days he would need the nap, like a clock that needed resetting. Even now, maybe once a month or every 6 weeks he will have a nap during the day but next day we have a normal day again.

  3. #3
    BellyBelly Member

    Jun 2005

    My Sam is just 10 days younger than your little one and there is no way she could go without a day sleep....shes up at 7am. Sleep at 1230pm. In bed for the night by
    Well done for feeding her this far along..... What does she do when you do leave her ? Cry, play, whinge ???
    How much sleep is she getting in a 24 hr period ?

    If you b/f her in her room, maybe feed her in another room, bright, curtains open, etc, let her have her feed, then take her to her cot/bed and explain that its sleep time. My DD takes a stuffed dog to bed, and has a bottle, so she knows those cues are for sleep. Your DD's cues are the breast. So maybe introduce something else (blankie, a book, a stuffed toy) that will prompt her little mind to suggest 'its sleep time'.....

    I dunno if thats any help....but 18 months does seem young to have no sleeps at all (and no break for you during the day either....).

    Good luck.

  4. #4
    Registered User

    Jan 2009

    All of our toddlers in this age group sleep at my work, in fact the majority of children in all age groups sleep for some length of time after lunch. In my opinion, children need a day time sleep up until they start school.

  5. #5
    Registered User
    Follow Pandora On Twitter

    Jan 2005

    i think its normal for an 18month old not to want to have one. some kids go through stages where they wont have them and then go back to them later. DS was never a fantastic day sleeper, but will generally have one as long as DH or I arent the ones asking him to, so daycare or people babysitting hes fine with.
    I think at that age its still impotant that they get some sort of rest in the day even if they wont sleep.

  6. #6
    Registered User

    Jan 2007

    Thanks Curly for the support and understanding. Nice to know I'm not the only one. lol

    MBear - When I pop her in her cot for a day sleep she cracks a tanty and just yells, howls, screams, squeals and everything in between but without tears or really working herself up. She sleeps from 7pm until at least 5am so 10 hours per day if not until 6am. I'm definately going to try something 'sleep' related like a snuggly or teddy. A GP told me to give her a dummy again (spat it out when she was 6months and never wanted it again) which i think is more regressing than anything. So a snuggly I am more than fine with. Especially seeing as my 28 year old DH still has a special pillowcase that he needs to sleep with. He'll actually take his pillow if we go anywhere or when we went overseas for our honeymoon, he just brought the pillowcase.

    ausgirl - any advice on how to get her to sleep then? what tricks do you guys use?

    Rayray - She has a rest period where she sits on the couch with her bottle of moo milk and watches tv for a bit. Thats her as long as she gets that I'm happy I guess.

    Thanks for all your help

  7. #7
    Registered User

    Jan 2009

    Mmmm, tricks of the trade hey? Well it definitely is alot easier when everyone is doing the same thing to begin with - so I have a bit of an advantage there!
    I think the key is routine, same time everyday, we do the same thing, children eat, have nappies changed/checked/toileting - the room is darkened, relaxing quiet music put on, staff go into super calm mode - no loud conversations, calm quiet demeanour.
    We pat about half of the younger children to sleep, back pats or rubs are great, also the old eye brow stroke works wonders. The older children have usually learned to sleep on their own by the time they move up to the older groups. The routine remains the same for all the ages though.

    My suggestions, set up a routine, do the same thing every day (especially while establishing the pattern), put away toys and distractions - maybe you might like to read a short book every day as a part of the routine. Darken your child's room, put on some relaxing music. Pat, stroke, rub to calm and soothe. Be firm, let your child know that it is rest time not play time, don't give in and hopefully you will have success!

    I would say any sleep, whether only 30 mins or an hour is better than none at all.

  8. #8
    Registered User

    Aug 2006
    Our house, in the middle of our street

    Hi Kate
    Hannah still has one - usually goes for between 2 - 3 hours. Have you tried exhausting her? Let her run around alot, go to the park etc? If you laid down on the floor beside her, would she lay down then? I reckon she still needs a sleep so that you can get a break lol. I really look forward to my 'me time'. Sounds terrible doesn't it?

  9. #9
    Registered User

    Nov 2008

    My DS is almost 18 months and has just started having a day nap again.

    He has completly gone off milk so no bottle to go to sleep but I find laying next to him for 5 minutes always works. I think he is going through a groth spurt he seems to be sleeping alot lately and hes eating alot more, so he may be over it in a couple of weeks and then hes back to just napping in the car again.


  10. #10
    BellyBelly Member

    Feb 2007

    hi kate
    Noah still has one, there is no way he can get through the day without one... but i have heard of some 18 mo who dont...
    i think the other ladies have some good ideas for you - i am certainly no expert when it comes to sleep - as you know N is still up many times in the night...
    have you tried just a cuddle/rock to sleep - thats what we do. i tell him lets go in his room and have a cuddle and whatever happens, happens - he is asleep within 5 mins for his day sleep. xxx

  11. #11
    Registered User

    Aug 2006
    On the other side of this screen!!!

    Just a couple of ideas - I have been thinking of S since you mentioned this in our thread the other day.

    Do you think she might be overtired/overstimulated...perhaps changing the activity for 45 mins before rest time OR moving rest time so that it's EARLIER might help. Missy E only ever resists when she's overtired, kwim?

    Could you encourage a quiet rest time without it having to be about sleeping? Things like lying down on the flipout sofa, hopping into bed with some books, or a CD/tape to listen to all work with toddlers. It will take the stress out of it being about 'sleeping' but hopefully still give you a peace and quiet window.

    My DD1 was still having a quiet rest right up until she started Kindy at age 4. Once she stopped needing a sleep she still knew the deal was that after lunch you go and spend some quiet time in your bedroom/on the FDC's couch - lying down, relaxing. Even now I occasionally send her for a 'rest' when she's in a foul mood.