You're doing so well hun! Babies are hard wired to be cuddled, held and loved. It's vital for brain development and for maintaining milk supply (a baby who sleeps through the night has to ensure they get all feeds in a 12 hr period, which is not great for many peoples supply, as well as being pretty unrealistic for most babies tummies and metabolisms).

You are doing it exactly right for you and your baby. We still feed to sleep at 2. And fwiw teaching dd to 'self settle' DID NOT help her sleep at night...she woke twice a night for feeds until I night weaned her at 18 months, and even then had to eat bananas because she was so hungry! Following your babies cues is all you're 'supposed' to do...there isn't a rule book.

Can you find a local ABA group instead of just mothers group? I too was alone in my parenting strategies and it can be hard.