There's a motto I heard somewhere which I remind myself of almost daily...

'you can't control how much they eat, but you can control what they eat'

I think the reality is that with a healthy toddler they won't starve themselves, so it won't really hurt her to withhold those foods that are just empty calories. I've also read (and seen with DS) that it isn't uncommon for toddlers to only eat one big meal every three days and then graze in between. The other thing to keep in mind is that if she does spit something new out, it's a good idea to continue offering it to her time and time again because chances are she will grow to like it. I remember reading when I was first starting DS on solids that you should try each food up to ten times before discounting it.

I'd also consider limiting her milk intake, because it is possible to give them too much dairy at this age. Maybe do a search and see what the maximum recommended amount of milk/dairy is after 12 months - I have feeling that they shouldn't have any more than 3 serves a day.