Well as I said in another thread, everything $200 and over in this house is a joint decision.. But the smaller spends don't just get done. Its all with consideration to the budget so really you could say that really - everything that isnt food or an essential household item is a joint decision. The "extras" we buy without talking first are usually never more than a few dollars each - or needed.
What would **** me off about that situation the most is he said no. More than once. I know for me at least, if I am asking for money for something then its something we need - and most of the time its not for me anyway! Right now I need a baby wrap sling so this klingon on my starboard bow will give me back my arms, but I know we don't have it in the budget yet - so I will wait. DH knows I need one - so he knows that if he pops out $30 on something frivilous he would lose any future procreating ability.
If it *was* something just frivilous for me - then yeah, I'd still be annoyed. If I have to wait, so the bloody hell can he! What makes HIS wants more important than mine?
Basically - IMO - he lost the right to blow $30 on crap the second he said you had to wait.
We have tried and tried to budget - but something always manages to goes wrong
As for spending money without "permission" I just don't do it. We have one account into which all our pay goes and our payments come from ... the only thing we spend money on without checking are essentials: groceries, petrol, work-necessities. If I went ahead and bought what I wanted, we'd be living in a tent with alot of musical instruments!
That works for us, but doesn't work for everyone. Just something to ponder on
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