I totally know the feeling. We are contributing to the house and we don't get 'paid' so we don't get that satisfaction where we think we deserve to buy things for ourselves. We are living and working overseas (well DH is working....I'm just on the 'dependants pass') so we are earning a fair bit there....but I STILL don't spend. I am thinking about our future. We are there earning big money for our future, so wants the sense in spending it!
Granted I don't have to worry about spending the money, but I do. I don't buy myself things....it's all for the kids really....oh and food! DH will still spend money guilt free on things I think he is wasting it on....so sometimes I DON'T feel guilty when I need something.
The one I hate the most is having to buy DH a present using 'his' money. That is when I will feel better once the kids are off to school and I can get myself a little part time job. Earning some of my own money again will give me that dependance I need.
Wow I could have written that word for word! That's exactly how I have been feeling lately!! Had a bit of a chat to DH the other day as it was eating me up a bit...Turns out we both feel a bit guilty about spending money so came up with the solution of having 'pocket money'. Each pay week we give ourselves $25 each and can spend it on whatever we like. DH has a few rather expensive hobbies (home brewing and his little music studio) so he often saves up for bigger things...I use mine on makeup, new shoes, magazines anything really. It's a bit corny but a great way for us to buy little things for ourselves without having to feel guilty....we both work hard after all and deserve a reward every now and again.
I am the main money earner in our house and I still feel guilty about spending it! Although not so much if I spend it on the boys, but I really have trouble spending money on me. Luckily my family and friends have cottoned on and give me gift vouchers to girls' clothes shops for birthday and christmas or I'd never have new clothes LOL! And that's even with a DH who doesn't care what I spend on me!!
I used to feel guilty buying things but now I don't. I think that if you can afford to buy it (as in you have a budget and you know the money is there to buy the item with) than go ahead and buy it. If you can't afford it than I think you do get to feel a little guilty, have some self control or re work your budget to allow for the items that you want to buy. If you do have the money than tell yourself that you and your partner work hard enough in life so you bloody well get to enjoy the things you want
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