Oh Tracey, I understand . The experience of labour and contractions is I think a deep rooted need for most of us having a child. And the thing with c/s is it robs you. I know when I had my c/s (I did get to feel contractions - but syntocinon ones.... so still not a natural labour) I said to my DH afterwards that apart from the obvious reason, I may as well have not been there. Everything happened around me, but I didn't feel part of it. And I think I was treated with alot of respect too, not like alot of people.

So by the sounds of it you will need the C/S to provide the best outcome for you and bubs. So my advice is work on making it the best experience for you that it can be. An empowered c/s. Work out how you want to be treated, how you want your baby to be treated so that you can feel ok about the raw deal that nature has dealt you. Things like the baby is to be taken from you and put straight on your chest. Freedom for your arms so you can hold your baby. And any tests or checks for the baby are to be done while it is on you, rather than taken away and wrapped and cleaned before you get to see it. When you go in to recovery the baby comes with you, you aren't to be separated unless medically necessary. (Work out what you consider as medically necessary too, some hospitals say the baby needs to go to SCN for monitoring when in actual fact it isn't necessary, just a precaution). The hospitals try to take alot of power away from you because it is convenient for them, or that is just how it has always been done. But the truth is most of 'hospital policy' (what they call it to get you to comply) is not actually written down anywhere and so therefore is not policy at all. Remember they aren't allowed to do anything without your permission, so use that power for the benefit of your family!!

I'm sure there is a c/s support thread on here and I'm sure many BB girls would love to share their experiences of empowered c/s.

Good luck with it all - I wish you and bubs well.